Loneliness is not real

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Saurav04, Apr 29, 2020.

  1. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

    105
    128
    43
    Try abstaining from PMO carefully and don't look facebook, instagram. If you don't see stupid posts from people about their bf/gf or partner etc and how much they are enjoying yo will feel better. Connect with real people who really wants you like your family. But do remember not to use high stimulating things like drugs, pmo, binging on your favorite tv series etc.
    Do dopamine detox that thing is real. Start enjoying small things and keep working on whatever you do.
    Most important thing is don't see stories on social media. Stop giving shit what other things do what you think is correct and don't struggle for people approval.
    Have a goal, without a goal everything seems futile and you will turn back to PMO. Rather than seeing couples are enjoying lockdown in covid. Think about all the hard work doctors make. Be valuable by giving back to society. I am sure loneliness will go away.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2020
  2. Ipolit

    Ipolit Fapstronaut

    70
    64
    18
    As if those people are just waiting for you around the corner. For me loneliness is real, always were, and always will be. Only option I see is to learn to accept it as it is. No one will come, no one will suddenly apear. Stop to hope that I'll find the real connection with someone, wont happen. I can spend rest of my life suffering of that hopes not coming to life or just to accept it. So what.
     
  3. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

    958
    1,189
    123
    Social media is fake. People only show what they want from their life, only the highligths. Nobody upload a video when they are crying in bed.
    One of my friends used to upload a lot of pictures with her GF every day, and telling her how much she love her, and she will reply the same to him in every message. But the reality they were in a bad relationship crisis and broke up a few weeks later. I quit social media a long time ago.

    No they don´t but they are out there. If you stay at home and don´t interact with people you will be lonelly. Go out, do stuff that require you to interact with different people. Like gym, diferent activities groups, join a team of the sport you like. Join a club. Join online communities, some of them go out in the real world. There are apps like bumble that besides the dating funtionality, there is a functionallity to look out for friends.
     
    Hracku and Saurav04 like this.
  4. I wish I could get lonely, but I'm just so good at coping with isolation that it doesn't seem to be an emotion I experience, except maybe on rare occasions.
     
    Saurav04 likes this.
  5. Jenkinspopper

    Jenkinspopper Fapstronaut

    19
    5
    3
    Man , to me loneliness is real, we're in a hard time that keep us seeing people we used to see and communicated everyday. that feeling is weird and it can be harmful. how you stop it depends on yourself. What it means to you? how that effect your pron addiction ?
     
  6. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

    105
    128
    43
    I was doing some research, I understand people need someone to share thoughts with. But I am not talking about virtual communication through social media or call etc. Usually we all humans want something if we are not happy with our lives. The problem with PMO is you think you will find better porn more harder, you might have some desire but it never fulfills. Then you might think if I had sex I won't see porn etc. Then again after doing sex etc you will feel I didn't try some position or some fantasy you might had. We humans keep desiring things and it never fulfills. Same goes with loneliness we feel we need someone but it's hard but not impossible to enjoy own company. We have to train ourselves with enjoying what we have and don't fulfill each of our desire because it's never enough. Maybe I am not good with words and it's hard to explain. But have a peace and accept things. It's better to change things if you think you can change it like if you feel going out and finding someone is good then do it. But again after so much PMO your mind have been hijacked you will go to the first person you will see even if they are not good just to cure your loneliness. What I mean is just don't be desperate to find someone keep improving and learning and analyze more. I am on PMO recovery I can say I have been failed hundreds of times. But as I am curing from PMO other things of life gets better. I am not here to prove you are wrong or I am right. It's what I believe and after thinking a lot I wrote this.
     
  7. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

    105
    128
    43
    Because of PMO I have failed so many times in things which are extremely important to me. Now I am trying to get my life better I was seeing people on omegle jerking off and I was on chat they were asking nudes from anyone. Then I thought if I don't change my thinking I will be same like them. For me I want to help the world by any means I can do. I am taking my life seriously all the work I have to I try to do the best I can and do it honestly. Exercise at home, cooking food at home for myself. Learning something new, removing all the porn stash I have from computer. Installing porn blockers on all my devices so I don't start watching porn again. These small things can make life better. If I don't have anything to do I get bored but if I am really very busy I don't feel lonely. I hope it helps
     
  8. stormbringer

    stormbringer New Fapstronaut

    2
    58
    13
    maybe that's why masturbation used to be known as "self-abuse".
     
  9. I dont know your exact situation but one thing I know for sure is there is somthing you can do about it even if you cant see that right now. And your belief that there isnt anything you can do is just keeping you in that place where nothing is gunna change for you, there 100% are things you can do, feel free to explain your situation I may be able to shed some light
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2020
  10. cd013

    cd013 Fapstronaut

    71
    75
    18
    How do you even cope so strongly? I'm interested in knowing
     
  11. do you really want to know man, loneliness is your motivation when you loose than you give up on making connections
     
  12. cd013

    cd013 Fapstronaut

    71
    75
    18
    Obviously I plan on connecting with someone in the future but I noticed that being on Nofap can tremendously increase Sexual frustration & loneliness so I was just wondering how you can cope with this. Also, having intimacy isn't a guarantee so knowing your way around dealing with the lack of it can help.
     
  13. I talk to myself, try to laugh and smile at everything (especially things that are not funny) which makes me more positive. I used to cope by using porn and a pillow, stuff like that. Obviously those things need to go. Video games and stuff too.
     
  14. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut

    1,790
    3,662
    143
    social media for me is just another sin and cause us deppresion

    for example

    one of my friend's always post about her husband, her daughter, her beautiful house's, her careers. its seem like she didnt have any problem in her life. but no man she had so many problem its just she post on the things that consider as a standar quality for people to define succes

    its often make me feel u human when i see her post, but when i knew the fact behind it. it make me think's that we are human, and we have our own problem. no human in this world have 0% problem. its how we react to it who define it
     
    Saurav04 likes this.
  15. NVG94

    NVG94 Fapstronaut

    144
    84
    28
    we are with you ...
     
  16. NVG94

    NVG94 Fapstronaut

    144
    84
    28
    JINX i Hate social media tooo.. because its fake - so movie-like representation of one's life. They take the picture perfect moment and share it- its good for their ego etc. they probably feel better. But this actually fks with my brain - thats the reality. I dont wanna know those fake [email protected]@3 And I dont have time to post anything on that [email protected]@@s ..
     
  17. hollyman

    hollyman Fapstronaut

    1,790
    3,662
    143
    exactly man even tho i knew that it might be not 100% true but somehow seeing a post on other people good life made me depressed

    its like im the one who left behind.. its suck man
     

  18. I deleted my social media accounts last week. I tried to get on once since then, but they wouldn't let me, I can't sign on now.

    I deleted them because, exactly as you mention, it made me more lonely.

    I wanted to talk to girls on there, to gain approval from strangers, to create and sell things nobody wanted.

    It was 2.5 years in coming, this abandonment of social media.

    I can't promise I'll NEVER go back, I don't know.

    But one thing that is bad is to sit here and try to talk to people on social media.

    They don't reward me quid pro quo there.

    I could meet someone and think we have hit it off, then a week later, I've been blocked or ghosted.

    There is the flood of news and posts, all of which are neither interesting, nor informative.

    All these thousands of people on my personal page and two others, who are these "fans"?

    Why do they want to be "fans" when they don't read or respond to my posts?

    It was becoming painful.

    I would turn on my computer, go to social media, and nobody would say anything to me.

    I started to feel like I was just asking for pain, for more loneliness.

    It's a certain amount of loneliness to NOT engage them, and be working on important things.

    But this loneliness is tripled if I turn on social media, look for people, and can't chat.

    Sometimes I would make my status as Online, and would listen for messages,

    nothing ever came.

    They don't want me, and I'm not chasing them.

    And what has happened is that my loneliness went to a small fraction.

    This made me decide to work on other projects I wanted to do, like this classical song I wanted to try to learn.

    I agree with this thread originator, who indicated that social media made the possibility of

    relapse more likely.
     
    Saurav04 likes this.
  19. Saurav04

    Saurav04 Fapstronaut

    105
    128
    43
    For me I felt much better after quitting social media and MO. Still not able to completely get rid of seeing porn. But reduced a lot. One thing I found on birthday only those people will remember who actually mean something to you, rather than hundreds of people posting Happy Birthday. When you meet someone you have more to talk they might ask you didn't you see that on my profile. You can say I don't use social media. This thing actually make you better in normal face to face conversation. Overall I have 0 regret leaving social media and stupid memes. Leaving lot of things at once takes quite a toll. This thing takes time and getting ready for new normal can take quite a while
     
  20. Yeah, it would be harder on younger guys. I'm 46, so I lived for a long time before social media was out.

    When I was in school, all the way through college in the 1990s, nobody had cell phones,

    social media or texting.

    I preferred it that way because life always made sense within the context that I was in.

    What I mean by that is that if I was walking down the street, then that's what i was doing.

    I wasn't walking down the street, texting somebody.

    If I went to eat dinner out, then I was doing that, not doing that and looking at social media.

    I didn't buy a bicycle so I could photograph it and let the world know.

    The reason that this is hard for younger people is because of this false mirage about being famous.

    Does anybody really deserve to get famous for drinking a cup of coffee, taking a selfie,

    or making a meme?

    No.

    But that is the kind of absurd thinking that prevails these days.
     
    matt2k12 likes this.

Share This Page