Looking for a small group of APs for a 365 day challenge. All or nothing!

Discussion in 'Accountability Partners' started by Abstainer101, Feb 2, 2019.

  1. JesseJames4242

    JesseJames4242 Fapstronaut

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    Cool guys thanks, I'll do a bit of research. Hope everyone has a good weekend!
     
  2. Hey Abstainer,
    Thanks. I used PMO for a really long period of time (>10 years) to solve loneliness, frustration and rejection to years of love addiction. As I'm now in a loving marriage and happy circumstances it's time to focus this so called addiction I thought last year and started my reboot at the 31st of December. After the rush of starting a new habit there has been some flatline days: instead of the often mentioned superpowers there is only frustration about the need to stay away from pictures of naked women... Background: in 2018 I watched only amateur forum pics/vids. No high gloss, no porntube etc. That's why in the last days this tiny devil my shoulder is penetrating me with the idea that in my case I wasn't supporting filmed prostitution or something else. Luckily there is this a small angel on the other shoulder reminding me of the brain changes porn is associated with. This journey is harder than expected.
    namaste
     
  3. B12rent

    B12rent Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I've definitely had some pretty serious urges....next time I will come here and try to talk through them that might help them go away a little quicker...no relapse yet, but I've come close....

    I think I may have actually got a bit of dopamine from meditating for the first time...so I am starting to actually enjoy it I think.

    Headspace is a good app to help get started...i also used the app simple habit, when i was beginning. And that has been 8 or nine months ago. I wasnt super faithful in doing it early on. But it does eventually pay off you just have to stay at it.
     
  4. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    awesome dude!
    good to here that you've been doing well.
    I have got some urges today but they weren't strong enough.
    To be honest, I can't even think about relapse at this stage. Meditating, finding new habits, leading a new group on nofap.
    I feel like I have to keep to keep everyone's spirit high.
    I think the next stage is to express all our urges related to relapses and watching porn in general which I am going to talk about in upcoming days.
    Keep Updated.
     
  5. Belkin

    Belkin Fapstronaut

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    Hey, I hope everyone is having a great weekend and staying strong!
     
    teochewoliver likes this.
  6. B12rent

    B12rent Fapstronaut

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    Definitely got some urges goin on right now... realized it, gonna try and do some yoga, take a cold shower and hit up my bed... plugging in my phone and not going to look at it again tonight.... stay strong friends!
     
    JesseJames4242 likes this.
  7. JesseJames4242

    JesseJames4242 Fapstronaut

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    I've done alright today, was out most of the day so stayed away from temptation. Leaving my computer out of my room and only bringing a book to bed. Hope you all have a good night.
     
  8. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    Well Done guys! I feel proud of myself and everyone in this group right now for getting through this week. If you have relapsed, thats ok too. Please mention it, its not a competition! Its amazing how you guys have coped with it so far. We will definitely have a list of short term coping strategies by the end of today and then we will focus on the long term too.

    I went out last night to a bar, finally took some action instead of sitting around fapping at home. I definitely had some strong urges when I was back but I managed to get by and listened to some music instead.
     
    B12rent likes this.
  9. B12rent

    B12rent Fapstronaut

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    Except I didn't....my watch told me I'd gotten an email...and I think my brain was just looking for any excuse to get my phone back. So all it took was an ad to pop up to send me down that rabbit hole...so I guess my year starts today now.
     
  10. teochewoliver

    teochewoliver Fapstronaut

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    I can't believe it, but it happened to me, too! Passed 1 week and instead of feeling better, the urges got worse. As expected, it happened last night in bed.... I used sheer willpower for 7 days straight and at that point, I caved in. Gonna have to find a way to prevent that again at all costs.

    Congrats to everyone who has passed 1 week and those, who are still on the journey to 7 days! We can do it, sooner or later, I believe in you guys :)

    Edit my tracker now, should display 0 pretty soon...
     
  11. JesseJames4242

    JesseJames4242 Fapstronaut

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    It's happened to us all guys. A week without PMO should make you guys proud, time to bounce back and keep fighting.
     
  12. Starklander

    Starklander Fapstronaut

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    Is it too late to join?
     
  13. Belkin

    Belkin Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys, I agree! A week is still great! Do you all know if there's a way to get notifications on my phone from this thead? It would be nice to be able to quick react to one another in our moments of weakness, ya know?
     
  14. Belkin

    Belkin Fapstronaut

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    I really like this idea. I've been doing this just to help out with sleep, but it is probably also great for our purposes here.
     
  15. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    Well done buddy! You managed to keep it up for a week. Thats an epic start.
    However, You haven't really succeeded until you have learnt from your mistakes.
    Please take your time to break down
    1)what made you relapse?
    2)What excuses were going through your mind when you said to yourself fuck this challenge and watch porn & fap instead?
    3)What would you rather have in your life that would keep you away from Porn and fap specifically? for example, a gf or fuck buddy? more friends, sports, hobbies etc.
    4) Have you been following the rules of this group? If not, why? Do we need to change some of the rules so it becomes easier for rest of us?
    5) Is there a way to become more disciplined and remind yourself that you are in a challenge? What would you do so it doesn't happen again?
    6) Do you actually want to quit for 365 days or just for a week? If yes, then please mention clear reasons why?
    If not, then you're probably not in the right group, you may need a short term challenge first before joining the 365 days?


    Please don't feel judged by the questions above, they are just a guide to really question yourself and dig deeper. At the end, this group is for your own self improvement. Take your time (even days) to come up with a proper reflection and post it here.
    Cheerio!
     
  16. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    Well done buddy! You managed to keep it up for a week. Thats an epic start.
    However, You haven't really succeeded until you have learnt from your mistakes.
    Please take your time to break down
    1)what made you relapse?
    2)What excuses were going through your mind when you said to yourself fuck this challenge and watch porn & fap instead?
    3)What would you rather have in your life that would keep you away from Porn and fap specifically? for example, a gf or fuck buddy? more friends, sports, hobbies etc.
    4) Have you been following the rules of this group? If not, why? Do we need to change some of the rules so it becomes easier for rest of us?
    5) Is there a way to become more disciplined and remind yourself that you are in a challenge? What would you do so it doesn't happen again?
    6) Do you actually want to quit for 365 days or just for a week? If yes, then please mention clear reasons why?
    If not, then you're probably not in the right group, you may need a short term challenge first before joining the 365 days?


    Please don't feel judged by the questions above, they are just a guide to really question yourself and dig deeper. At the end, this group is for your own self improvement. Take your time (even days) to come up with a proper reflection and post it here.
    Cheerio!
     
  17. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    Hey Buddy, You are in time!
    Welcome to the group. Please make sure you have read the rules and realized that this is a 365 days challenge!
    Post your reasons about why NoFap is so important to you and why do you think you will manage to stay clean for 365 days.
    Cheerio
     
    Starklander likes this.
  18. Starklander

    Starklander Fapstronaut

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    Hey everyone. I wanted to let you all know why I decided to take this challenge, even though this is my first day as what I have come to know as a Fapstronaut.

    For about a year now I have been trying to stop many habits which I find unhealthy, a large one being my excessive use of porn and faping. At the time I decided to change this aspect of myself by only abstaining from porn, and continued to fap quit often. It got to the point where I wasn't even enjoying faping(I would do if so often), which of course led to porn usage. I have done this on and off many times, and I think the longest I have gone without porn was little less than a month.

    Last night this happened again, and I decided I am done with it, faping included. I did some reading on the effects of rebooting, and I have to say I am excited. I am tired of not being in control and feeling horrible.

    While I am still going to follow the rules provided by this particular challenge, I am going to add a few of my own. They are the following:

    •Zero media, movies, or video games(exceltions: anything school related, and Minecraft is okay as long as it is with my younger siblings.)
    •Three meals a day of 30 minute length. I have an issue with food, and I am not about to make that worse.
    •I will grow out my hair for as long as I am successful, and cut it if I relapse. I call this the "Samson clause" (I may post photos when my hair gets really long). I am not personally religous, but I like the symbol of self control and strength that the guy's hair gives off. Only this time I will not fall to temptation like Samson, and have my luscious locks cut by my mistress.

    I hope we can all get through this! I am excited and have high hopes.
     
    Belkin and Abstainer101 like this.
  19. Abstainer101

    Abstainer101 Fapstronaut

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    For the rest of this week, I would like everyone to focus on habit patters and the times at which you fap the most usually and what leads up to opening porn website and fapping. So for example, I want you to go back in the past and recall all the events that leads up to watching porn. In my case, its usually I am at home after work and I feel really tired, worn out and bored, so I think might as well loosen up and watch some porn and relax myself.
    So at this time, I can meditate and take a 20 minutes nap.
    I could leave the house and go for a walk.
    I could plan something for the next day
    I could cook a meal for tomorrow

    What are your habit patterns. Please list the patterns, time of events and replacement activity.
    This will help us to identify the vulnerable time of the day where likely to relapse and create awareness
    so we do the next best thing instead of watching porn & fapping.
    Peace!
     
  20. JesseJames4242

    JesseJames4242 Fapstronaut

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    I usually PMO before bed. I often bring my computer into my room before I go to sleep and go from there. I've found leaving all electronics out of my room really helps me avoid temptation. Because I'm used to reading my phone or computer before bed, I've been reading a book until I'm too tired to think and then I go right to bed. When I wake up, I don't have anything to flip on, so I can get ready for my day without being tempted. So far it's worked for me - what else have you guys been doing?
     

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