Losing Hope, But Starting Again

I haven't read your whole posting; but many parts. You are young and fighting PMO for awhile. For that alone consider yourself very lucky. When I was young , I had lots of girls and sex. I still would jerk off constantly. While in the army, I would make the 4-5 hour drive,when possible, to see my girlfriend and of course, have sex. I recalled last night how I would leave her heading back to my fort and still masturbate, in my car. I couldn't stop and thought it was normal. It made me a lesser soldier and had I known or was made aware of my problem would like to think that I would of at least fought some, like you are doing. You are on to a major life changing style. Keep up the good fight. Self control is paramount.