Lost but still have some confidence - The Start of a Journey

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by WarriorReborn, May 27, 2019.

  1. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    Hello everyone.
    I'm a 29 years old guy whose life has been destroyed by PMO.

    I started masturbating at a very young age, and porn came later on.
    My imagination was always strong when it came to creating sexual scenes in my mind and masturbating to them.
    Though recently I came back to porn, and watching it kind of became a habit again.

    Masturbation has ruined my life to an unimaginable extent.
    I don't know how many times I quit a sport, missed school, lost a friend or a girlfriend because of the after effects of masturbation and orgasm.

    In the beginning I had no idea it was related to PMO, until I started saying to myself things like: "I feel like shit and very tired today, so I will go to school after two days or so". And usually in those 2 days I would relapse and extend the period away from school or training, or just cancel an appointment I had arranged.

    The thing is, I know I am capable of amazing stuff, coming up with very creative ideas, make friends easily or attract the other sex when I am away from that bad habit for a long period of time.
    I could resist for about a week in the past, but no more than 3 days these days.
    There is always a thing in my head that urges me to masturbate even if I don't want to, and it's so annoying that it wouldn't go without accomplishing the deed.

    I know all the stories that go: do some exercise, go for a walk, talk to a friend, ... etc.
    It just isn't as simple as that, i.e. doesn't work.
    And to the doctors who say: "Oh masturbation isn't harmful at all, in fact it's very healthy" I say "Do it yourselves", cuz I'm really done with it.. As they say "Feels the bee's stinger only he who have been stung by it".

    I was so confident I could quit alone, but apparently it's kind of impossible.
    The reason why I am here is to get help to quit and change my life forever, for now I'm walking a very dark road, and it's getting darker and darker.

    In the end thank you for taking the pain to read all this, and I hope to get a positive feedback and advice from you guys.
     
    Foton, Zeezee, Hardcandy and 5 others like this.
  2. Despicable me

    Despicable me Fapstronaut

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    Welcome on board. Its hard, we all know it. Thats why we are here and supporting each other. You just have to fight it, and after you get knocked down you stand right up again. The secret to sucsess is when you get knocked down 7 times you have to get up 8 times. Good luck
     
  3. Pafton Tsumi

    Pafton Tsumi Fapstronaut

    Sounds like you were one decision away from a completely different life and you chose the right one - glad to have you here. I wish you all the best on your journey and suggest you fill your glass with some of the huge success stories on here and start up a journal that you post to daily to help with your focus.
     
    Gef.71 and WarriorReborn like this.
  4. Despicable me

    Despicable me Fapstronaut

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    I have a journal. "Day 1 vol. 1000" check it out.
     
    Hardcandy and WarriorReborn like this.
  5. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    Thank you guys for your kind words. Help is really available for anyone who seeks it.
    My first goal is to abstain from PMO for 3 days and then start a journal.
    Meanwhile I will take a look at success stories and pieces of advice posted by other users, and the one Despicable Me just mentioned.
    Thanks again !
     
  6. Always be positive

    Always be positive Fapstronaut

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  7. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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  8. montebeta

    montebeta Fapstronaut

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    Same here I joined recently and my longest streak is 5 days only, it's not easy u know even after if I go for walk, do exercise, play it again started to arise sometimes i get aroused at midnight what to do I can't do above things at the midnight u know it's a vicious cycle your mind complels u to watch porn and when u do u feel more aroused to watch more porn and when u do u can't control yourselves u just fap, it's happened with me but there's advantage of it that I am feeling more motivated then before and I will try that never ever porn can defeat me and I will fight it more hardly as long I can fight, best of luck
     
    WarriorReborn likes this.
  9. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the message man. I know about midnight (or past midnight) trauma, when you are trying to sleep but you fail, and then your subconscious mind offers you a temporary solution to feel good, PMO.
    The thing is, now my only obsession now has become quitting PMO, instead of doing other positive and beneficial stuff like before.
    It is way better to accept the fact that one will probably fail, again and again, and fall, and the most important thing is to rise stronger after each fall.

    It feels good to talk about it though, so thanks again!
    Good luck:)
     
  10. Heyyy welcome to the NoFap forum : ) It's nice to see you here fighting the good fight alongside us!

    Here is just some advice:

    First and foremost please take a look at each section in the forum, there might be something(s) you may find of big help to you. Feel free to post there :+)

    Then secondly I just strongly advise you to be active on your profile(as there quite a few active people in the profile section). Please start by choosing an avatar and then make daily status posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've also got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you encouragement/support.

    People (are beginning to) love communicating in the profile section..(it should be and is )mostly spportive talk but it doesn't hurt to deviate from supportive talk. It would be great to have you join in and support others in the threads, profiles, and journal, we could always use your help and in return you shall receive some as well!

    Thirdly, You should also highly consider creating a public journal and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along your journey and offer support to you by way of posting in your journal.

    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!
     
    WarriorReborn likes this.
  11. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your message, and for the support :)

    Though I am not really new in here (almost 3 months in). And I guess that by "avatar" you mean a profile picture, which I already have.

    But thank you, I'll do my best to follow your advice (posting on my profile, and commenting on others').
    Just wondering whether it's really okay to post on your profile on a daily basis ?!

    Anyway, May the force be with us in our fight, and nice AVATAR you have got :*)
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  12. No worries, bud.

    Oh, I see I messed up. Lol. Well..uh.. this is your 3rd month welcome, welcome to the third month here! :b
    Posting on your profile everyday is ok to do, perfectly legal lol.


    Thanks so much!
     
    WarriorReborn likes this.
  13. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    Cool !
    Thanks a lot Moderator Assistant dude :D
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.
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  15. WarriorReborn

    WarriorReborn Fapstronaut

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    @Mowgli 32 Thanks man. I wish you the same and more.
    I am joining:)
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  16. Great man, I'll see you there!
     
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