Made it to 30, my story so far.

So on Saturday morning I made it to 30 days no PMO, overall it wasn't too bad there were some really bad urges and cravings and browsing the internet caused me to stumble onto quite a few triggers.

However I resisted them, not only did I start this journey I also started a weight loss journey(on January 4th), I have so far dropped 25 pounds now and feeling way better then I have in ages. I replaced internet time with healthier habits such as walking,jogging, exercising, lifting weights, reading, researching topics such as nutrition, weight loss, business, economics, healthy living. I reduced my lazy time such as playing too much video games, watching too much TV. I have tried foods I used to claim I hated but turned out it was more an unwillingness to even really try them.

Large social gathering and going to clubs used to make me get really anxious and 9/10 times I would make up an excuse to bail on the people who invited me. When I hit 30 days on Saturday I was invited to 2 different birthday parties at 2 different bars. I decided to test how far i have came and attend both I went to the first from 7pm-9:45pm and the second from 10pm-1am. Not only did I feel more social and confident in these situations I really enjoyed myself and didn't feel awkward and uncomfortable like I used to.

Since I am dieting I avoided alcohol and just drank water, and used will power to avoid all the junk food around me. The avoidance of alcohol wasn't purely based on calories but also on purging myself of all unhealthy/potentially addictive habits during my no PMO and weight loss.

Other things I have noticed through this month:
-More energy
-More motivation
-clothes fit better/more comfortably
-fit into more clothes
-Browsing on internet my triggers no longer have as powerful as an effect.
-Really just feel way better all the time.

I have decided to keep pushing on to 90 days and see where that takes me, reading posts in this community has made me feel less alone and isolated and not like some weird anomaly. Thanks for reading my story so far.

 

Thanks man!

 

Day 35:

Last night was by far the worst night of this whole journey so far for me. I was awake all night due to the inability to sleep, I could not shut my eyes, was super restless, i was cold so i used more blanekts then i was to hot. The cravings i was getting to masturbate and watch porn were the most intense I have suffered so far. None of my normal tactics to fight them were working (reading, video games, journalling etc...). It was -19 celcius and windy as hell, and freezing rain but I still went outside for a walk around the block, it was creepy as hell walking outside at 2am in that weather, I slipped and fell on my ass.

However when I got back inside the cravings were down enough for me to get engrossed in reading (currently Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg). I just wish I could have got some sleep. I am just super happy and proud I was able to beat that terrible night without a reset.