Maladaptive Daydreaming

Hi Everyone,

have any of you ever come across the phrase "Maladaptive Daydreaming?" Here is one definition of this problem:

"Maladaptive daydreaming is a behavior where a person spends an excessive amount of time daydreaming, often becoming immersed in their imagination. This behavior is usually a coping mechanism in people who have mental health conditions like anxiety."

IMO, this is a valid explanation for PMO addiction. Many people, myself included, find it very hard to maintain long term real life relationships. Therefore the escape into fantasy sexual activity is very appealing. Even though most people realise that it is an unhealthy activity!

I will expand upon what I've written by quoting the Irish writer C.Lewis;

"For me the real evil of masturbation would be that it takes an appetite which, in lawful use, leads the individual out of himself to complete (and correct) his own personality in that of another (and finally in children and even grandchildren) and turns it back; sends the man back into the prison of himself, there to keep a harem of imaginary brides.

"And this harem, once admitted, works against his ever getting out and really uniting with a real woman.

"For the harem is always accessible, always subservient, calls for no sacrifices or adjustments, and can be endowed with erotic and psychological attractions which no woman can rival.

"Among those shadowy brides he is always adored, always the perfect lover; no demand is made on his unselfishness, no mortification ever imposed on his vanity.

"In the end, they become merely the medium through which he increasingly adores himself…After all, almost the main work of life is to come out of our selves, out of the little dark prison we are all born in. Masturbation is to be avoided as all things are to be avoided which retard this process. THE DANGER IS THAT OF COMING TO LOVE THE PRISON!"

Please note, that the capitalization, and exclamation mark, of the final sentence, were done by myself. Please let me know what you think of this post.

Good luck folks!

 

Hi Xue,
I have never been able to quit maladaptive daydreaming. I too have fantasies of being an expert at physical and verbal self defense. But like yourself I don't do confrontation very well. Instead I create scenarios, in my mind, during which I am strong and assertive. Truth be told I have chronic low self-esteem!
My PMO addiction is merely an extension of maladaptive day dreaming. During these sessions I try to convince myself; that I am making love to the world's most beautiful women. When I finish, reality hits me full in the face. I feel ridiculous and soiled! Which only restarts the toxic cycle once more.

What then is the solution? I'm afraid I don't know! If I ever find out I will post it on this thread.

Take care comrade!