Man it's like I'm going in circles

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Conor, Jul 5, 2017.

  1. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    Wassup guys,

    New to the site, want to meet some people who can offer some advice.

    I've known about NoFap for over a year now, my best streak has been 30 days. Since then it's pretty much been downhill, relapse after relapse. A couple of weeks then relapse, a week then relapse. Now I'm at a point where I relapsed after 2 days. At 30 days I was passionate about my purpose, motivated to achieve it..now it feels distorted and hard to visualise, things just aren't the same.

    You would have thought that after over a year knowing about this, I would have conquered this shit already. What gets me every single fucking time are the channels like babestation and studio66. It's stupid and I know it is.

    I just don't want to keep doing this anymore. I need abstinence to be a part of my life, to the point where I don't even have to think about it anymore.

    I've considered cancelling my wifi because my phone network has adult sites blocked, but then I won't be able to use YouTube on the TV, though I do have an iPhone 6s Plus which is a pretty big phone.

    Any advice guys?
     
  2. Miked132

    Miked132 Fapstronaut

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    I have have the same problem man I've considered turning off wifi too, but I have a family and it wouldn't be fair to them, you know what burns me is that every time you call down to the cable and internet provider they say they don't have parental controls on routers, and you can do it yourself but it's the biggest head ache in the world but it's doable.
     
    Conor likes this.
  3. don't cancel your wifi, lets do this 30 days together, I know what you mean, I went 100 days once, now I can not go 5 days with out PMO. lets get this done!!!
     
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  4. LavaMe

    LavaMe Fapstronaut

    I don't know what your habit used to be but maybe you've had some success even with your shorter streaks. If so you know you can do it. You do have to want to stop. So do you? Look at what PMO gets you? Is it worth it? It sure isn't for me. That doesn't mean I don't see something I like in it. But if I think about it it causes far more damage that isn't worth the brief amount of pleasure.

    With better routers or router firmware you can disable WiFi to certain devices only. You could just shut off WiFi to your personal devices.
     
    Conor likes this.
  5. Miked132

    Miked132 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, hadn't thought about just disabling it
     
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  6. NightReaper775

    NightReaper775 Fapstronaut

    You could install filters like the famous K9, whitelist useful sites that could have been blocked, and change the password to never relapse there again, and using YouTube on "restricted mode" (at the bottom of the site, and you can lock the settings so you do not change it). Greetings.
     
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  7. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    Let's do it brother, day 7 today and going strong.
     
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  8. StraightEdge3616

    StraightEdge3616 Fapstronaut

    Keep up the great work man, we are all in this together! Reach out to me if I can help in any way.
     
    Conor likes this.
  9. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    I appreciate that man, likewise!
     
  10. mghyper17

    mghyper17 Fapstronaut

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    hi man you can't block yourself from the outside world in my opinion.
    i dont think that blockers and those things are the cure to our problem, we need to be strong mentally and keep pushing to achive the goal..
    good luck!
     
  11. I feel your frustration after having relapsed at day 175 yesterday and day before. I really thought that at day 175 my character had changed and I would never relapse for as long as I live. What I believe helped me get that far is a technique which you could google and learn more about; it's called the no arousal method. The day before and on the day I relapsed I let my mind wander and focus on inappropriate stuff, whereas instead I should have meditated or exercised until the urged subsided. I strongly recommend utilizing the no arousal method. You will also need some reconditioning which you could do by yourself. What I normally do now is when I see something arousing or inappropriate anywhere any time, I instantaneously look away and reaffirm "I'm on day so and so and I am going to stay that way." In addition to that, you need to incorporate new habits such as daily meditation, prayer, reading books, exercising, and going for walks in nature and completing your work. That's how I managed to get to almost 6 months. At the same time, you need to link immense pain and suffering to the habit or addiction you wish to ultimately overcome, and link pleasure to reading books, exercising, meditation and praying; the good habits and addictions. If you look at the cycle of a habit or addiction, you need to keep the cue and the reward the same, but change the routine. So next time you get an urge, read a book, go for a jog or walk, take a shower, do some house cleaning, pray, meditate, wash the car, play with your pet and so on. The idea is to transmute your energy.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 14, 2017
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  12. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    Yeah man, I think the answer is to be disciplined in mind and then you don't need to take measures like that. Day 12 today, had some mad urges yesterday and today.
     
  13. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

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    The more you partake of those sites you will most certainly wank. It's pretty guaranteed.
     
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  14. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    Yeah definitely, I agree. Once you look you lose right?
     
  15. Conor

    Conor Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for that, I love what you said about linking pain to the habit we are trying to overcome and linking pleasure to more productive and better things. Day 13 now, I've had some urges but I did as you said and they subsided. I think I just have to realise that there are going to be tough times on this journey, but going back is harder. I used to rely on my feelings too much I think, whereas now I understand they won't ALWAYS be aligned to what we are trying to achieve. A certain amount of willpower is needed.
     

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