Many questions !

Deleted Account · Sep 15, 2020

Not sure if this is the right thread. But I have several questions.

How do you or how can I control orgasms ?

Usually I O without Ming.

How do you control turn ons ?

How do you control lust ?

How do you control any and all thoughts ?

I have thoughts about sex and of my future wife. No matter what it is or who it is, I see things on tv or on my other devices, rather it’s a P-sub or not even sexually related at all and I lust after people and sexualize them. I even use reading some things as P-subs like I did yesterday. I read about sex and marriage on the Bible app. Just a few minutes ago, I watched some videos on nofap of testimonies and I lusted after the wife and sexualized her and the videos. But it was Christian videos. I turned those into P-subs.

I Would love to hear from anyone in general about these things.

These are the things that are killing me and frustrating me.

zen3001 · Sep 15, 2020

Grant Thompson said: ↑

Not sure if this is the right thread. But I have several questions.

How do you or how can I control orgasms ?

Usually I O without Ming.

How do you control turn ons ?

How do you control lust ?

How do you control any and all thoughts ?

I have thoughts about sex and of my future wife. No matter what it is or who it is, I see things on tv or on my other devices, rather it’s a P-sub or not even sexually related at all and I lust after people and sexualize them. I even use reading some things as P-subs like I did yesterday. I read about sex and marriage on the Bible app. Just a few minutes ago, I watched some videos on nofap of testimonies and I lusted after the wife and sexualized her and the videos. But it was Christian videos. I turned those into P-subs.

I Would love to hear from anyone in general about these things.

These are the things that are killing me and frustrating me.
Click to expand...

try to become self-aware of your tendency to lean into these thoughts. i also had the issue of sexualizing practically every woman i saw. even if i wasn't inherently attracted to them. even if it was morally wrong to do so. so every time i felt myself doing this, i spoke to myself internally and reminded myself that the woman in question is an actual human being. With emotions, problems, traumas, loved ones, dreams, goals just like me. women aren't sex toys. they're not objects. they're humans just like us. just remind yourself of that as often as possible.

Deleted Account · Sep 15, 2020

zen3001 said: ↑

try to become self-aware of your tendency to lean into these thoughts. i also had the issue of sexualizing practically every woman i saw. even if i wasn't inherently attracted to them. even if it was morally wrong to do so. so every time i felt myself doing this, i spoke to myself internally and reminded myself that the woman in question is an actual human being. With emotions, problems, traumas, loved ones, dreams, goals just like me. women aren't sex toys. they're not objects. they're humans just like us. just remind yourself of that as often as possible.
Click to expand...

Okay, got it. Wow and that’s bad. Wow, same here. Yeah, so true. Oh that’s awesome and yes, I need to do that next time. These are humans. Yes, they are to all of that. Nope, they’re not sex toys. Nope, not at all. Yes they are, they’re humans. Okay, I will. Thank you so much.

Reverent · Sep 15, 2020

It sounds like you have a well tuned fantastical brain full of fantasy and imagination. This hypergraphic brainpower is fueling your compulsions. My best advice is, come back to reality. Sooner than later.

But the great news is: you are in charge of that same brain that hijacks you and leads you to lust!

So maybe instead of hyperfantasizing a non reality, use that creative brain to reconstruct the narrative. Instead of pretending some woman in a vid or pic wants you, serves you, or likes what you're doing to her... imagine the humanity of the woman. If you have to, tell yourself more lies about her so you are turned off. It's all make-believe after all anyway, right.

Until you can properly value a woman as more than an object and respect her humanity, try this. ☝️

Lust is a selfish endeavor. You don't have a pornography problem, you have a connection problem. Try building authentic real connections with real people. Be vulnerable, step out of your comfort zone.

It gets better. God speed!

Deleted Account · Sep 15, 2020

Reverent said: ↑

It sounds like you have a well tuned fantastical brain full of fantasy and imagination. This hypergraphic brainpower is fueling your compulsions. My best advice is, come back to reality. Sooner than later.

But the great news is: you are in charge of that same brain that hijacks you and leads you to lust!

So maybe instead of hyperfantasizing a non reality, use that creative brain to reconstruct the narrative. Instead of pretending some woman in a vid or pic wants you, serves you, or likes what you're doing to her... imagine the humanity of the woman. If you have to, tell yourself more lies about her so you are turned off. It's all make-believe after all anyway, right.

Until you can properly value a woman as more than an object and respect her humanity, try this. ☝️

Lust is a selfish endeavor. You don't have a pornography problem, you have a connection problem. Try building authentic real connections with real people. Be vulnerable, step out of your comfort zone.

It gets better. God speed!
Click to expand...

Unfortunately yes I do. Yes it is. Yep. I really want to and yes for sure.

yep. It seems like I’m not.

okay and wow, okay, I can try. Yes and wow, I really need to do that. Wow, that’s seems hard to do. Yes, that is so true. Yep.

okay and okay, I will try.

yes it is for sure. Well, I’m getting it under control finally. Yes, that’s true. Another part of the same relationship I had. Okay, I will try to do that. Okay and yes, I really should.

yes and I’m so glad about that. Yep.

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Many questions !

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