Hi everyone, This is my first post and I don't exactly know how it all works but I really need some guidance and dont have anywhere else to go. I got married just over two years ago. I knew something was off straight away in terms of intimacy and sex even at our honeymoon. I felt like I always had to initiate and that he wasn't 100% into it. A month into our marriage was when I trusted my instincts and went through my partners phone. I was shocked at what I found - porn, speaking to other ladies online, subscriptions to hooking up websites, the debt he was in, instagram accounts of girls and online pills (energy/focus pills) he was ordering. I confronted him, we had big arguments where he was really sorry and promised to change. It was 1 month into our marriage so I had to give him a chance and i believed he was sorry. Time and time again whenever we argued it was me comforting him telling him he is not a bad person and he just needed to change his ways. After i found out our sex life got worse. It felt forced, I even found enhancement drugs he had ordered and it made me feel horrible knowing he needed that to be with me. It went from a couple of times a week, to once a week, to once a month, down to nothing. We haven’t had sex in 19 months and I've been married for 26 months. It came to the point where every two weeks I'd have break downs and cry and ask him to try and have sex with me or show me any intimacy and work on his issues. Every time he would promise and say haven't i changed..followed by me finding out he's always lying, he's still using porn and has changed nothing. What complicates the issue more is that I fell pregnant 3 months into our marriage and we have a beautiful baby boy who turned 1 recently. We get along so well, however we live more like room mates in the sense that there's no romance, intimacy, kissing etc. I'm not unattractive, i didn't gain much weight during pregnancy and lost it all soon after i gave birth. It was always a new excuse. First it was I'm ashamed you found out so it makes it hard to be intimate, then it was I gained weight so i dont feel comfortable (he gained 25kg since we got married and i never said anything nor do i care), then it was you're pregnant it feels weird..followed by we wouldn't have time, you're looking after the baby and probably tired (which im not). His parents always take our baby to take care of him so we have a lot of nights with just us two at home. I'm tired of begging to be wanted. I sent him to the psychologist (a year after he promised he would go, he finally went) and all they spoke about was his work and his other issues with little focus on us and porn. He continues to not save money and waste it on online prescription drugs, continues to go on porn with bouts of trying NoFap, barely has energy to spend time with us and shows no affection. If i didn't have my son to worry about I probably wouldn't have stuck around for so long. I desperately want to make it work but am running out of options. Am i kidding myself by believing that he actually wants to change? Do I stay?