Marriage to unbelievers

For Fapstronauts who are disciples of Christ

  1. Romans 6 23

    Romans 6 23 Fapstronaut

    Thought I would start a thread. Maybe some guys can relate and maybe we can all help each other with wisdom and prayer.

    A bit about me and my family for those who dont know. Im 32 and born again as of almost 3 years ago. Grew up in a Baptist home but from ages 15 to 29 was a stoner with no interest in going to church. I have 2 daughters ages almost 6 and 2 and have been married 3 years on june 23rd.

    So for those who are good at math I became a devoted follower of Jesus after getting married and our first daughter was conceived and born out of wedlock.

    My wife grew up not going to church til age 10 when her mom married her stepdad. However he went to churches where weird things happened during worship and has multiple stories of men in leadership abusing their power to steal from the church.

    So you can kind of imagine how my wife felt when he husband tells her hes given up weed and is attending church every Sunday.

    It hasnt been easy and we are so blessed to have found a wonderful church home. We have made friends there and my daughters really look forward to church and Awanas (well before cov ID and hopefully this fall).

    However my wife still hasn't repented and doesnt believe Jesus as lord and savior. She kind of sorta believes in God. But she doesnt think she needs a savior. She says she's a good person. Hasnt done anything that bad. That kind of thought process. She also struggles with the bible and homosexuality and abortion. We live in liberal western Washington and have friends and family who are openly gay.

    One big struggle we have had has been over giving to the church. She basically doesnt want to give anything. That is one area where I have decided to yield to her rather than letting an offering be a stumbling block to the gospel.

    Anybody else on here with a similar situation?
  2. CPilot

    CPilot Fapstronaut

    Sorry, I don't have experience with this kind of relationship. However, I want you to know I truly admire your determination to remain faithful to Our Precious Lord despite this challenge. St. Monica prayed for 15 years for the conversion of her son, St. Augustine. Perhaps prayer is the only thing you need do at this time and trust the Lord will answer your prayers in His time; His timing is not ours but then His timing is always perfect.
    Romans 6 23 likes this.
  3. Generosity is a trait that all people admire. Instead of giving "to the church," maybe you and she can decide together an amount of money you will set aside each month to give to a charity that you both support. Or just have a small pool of money to be able to give from as you learn of needs in your community.

    We give to break the hold that money can have over us. We cultivate generosity in order to also grow our sense of gratitude for our many blessings. Where the money actually goes is not so important.

    Your character and behavior as a husband and father will be far more of witness to your wife than your words alone ever will be. In fact, words may get in the way! May God bless you and your family.
    CPilot and Romans 6 23 like this.
  4. Romans 6 23

    Romans 6 23 Fapstronaut

    Tao, I was literally thinking the same thing yesterday at work! I listen to the Dave Ramsey show so what you're saying really echos what he teaches. I do try to be a generous giver. I keep a Costco size box of granola bars and will usually give those (and the banana i didnt eat from my lunch) to people begging at a street corner.

    Also I have rediscovered the joy of being a generous tipper during the pandemic. And its far more rewarding to see someones face light up when you hand over a generous tip then write one on a receipt to that person delivering pizza or chinese food to your home. But all of that is indeed lacking. God wants to teach us all to be generous givers. Well we have a paycheck coming in a week and a half so I will bring that up before we budget it.
    LyarTheTruth, Tao Jones and CPilot like this.

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