Married looking for newbie partner

Day 94 - yesterday I watched a nude scene from a movie a few times. I didn't MO. This has occurred a handful of times during my NoFap. I think some part of my mind is justifying it. But, now that I think about it is obviously the essential ingredient in P, and it's not stuff I ought to be seeing. I guess it's hard because PMO is so violently bad to my soul, but soft stuff doesn't have that noticeably awful effect. I guess it's more on faith that I know it's bad. Obviously I was tempted after a while to MO but I'm pretty innately set against it. I really should look away when those scenes even come on but I can't bring myself to "miss out" on it. There definitely seems to be some contradiction/hypocrisy going on in my mind. I'd appreciate any ones thoughts about this

 

Day 99, tomorrow will be a good milestone. I've had a good week since the last post, been doing a lot of thinking about the previous post as well as looking at women I see at work. I have to decide to take that as seriously as pmo even though the effects aren't as bad, it's still bad.
I've also been thinking, not to diminish 100 days or anything, but 3 months doesn't sound like a big deal. I mean it is incredibly difficult but it just doesn't sound impressive. When people tell you how long they've been sober it's like 10 or 15 years that's 3000 days. Sorry if this is discouraging to anyone but it's just what I've been thinking

 

Day 100 dum dum dum!!
Only 900 days until the next new digit.
I think I'm done posting on this journal for now. I'll check in at major milestones and read other threads. If anyone happens to read this give a post and I'll reply. Stop fappin y'all.
If you are early on, just about everyone on here will tell you it's worth it to get to 100 days. Do it!

 

Porn isn't something good that we should "Deny" ourselves from. It is in fact a leech that sucks the life out of real relationships. It sucks the intimacy out of sex. It turns sex into a consumable entertainment that replaces the otherwise lofty virtuousness of it.
I "want" to look at it right now. Because it has an attraction and pleasure to it. But if I endulge in that pleasure I will be tearing down the much deeper and profound alternative. The former provides pleasure that doesn't fulfil and craves more. The latter is less "instantly" gratifying but it is real and therefore more holistically satiating.