Masturbating Mental Illness

[abrownhell]

Hi everyone, really excited to be on this forum. I am 35 yo male residing in Sydney, Australia. I used to be a regular Fapper (Once everyday) back in my early and late 20s with not much issues (atleast I thought so). Roughly 2-3 years back I noticed that whenever I fapped exactly 24hours later I would get extremely depressed. The depression is such that it creates a lot of negative thoughts (self loathing), aggression/anger (Parents especially my poor mom is my prime target to vent anger) and anhedonia. Its like masturbation started bringing a very villianous side of me. I am naturally a calm, easy going guy but somehow masturbating even once a week or month now brings the exact same symptoms every single time. I have been to a psychiatrist and he thinks I could have genetic mental issues which frankly I think is bollocks since I am mentally doing alright in a challenging work environment and in general. Its only when I masturbate that I become kind of an autistic aggressive mental animal. Has anyone dealt with this situation? If so would be really appreciative if you could give some tips to handle this situation.

 

[Jefe Rojo]

Hi everyone, really excited to be on this forum. I am 35 yo male residing in Sydney, Australia. I used to be a regular Fapper (Once everyday) back in my early and late 20s with not much issues (atleast I thought so). Roughly 2-3 years back I noticed that whenever I fapped exactly 24hours later I would get extremely depressed. The depression is such that it creates a lot of negative thoughts (self loathing), aggression/anger (Parents especially my poor mom is my prime target to vent anger) and anhedonia. Its like masturbation started bringing a very villianous side of me. I am naturally a calm, easy going guy but somehow masturbating even once a week or month now brings the exact same symptoms every single time. I have been to a psychiatrist and he thinks I could have genetic mental issues which frankly I think is bollocks since I am mentally doing alright in a challenging work environment and in general. Its only when I masturbate that I become kind of an autistic aggressive mental animal. Has anyone dealt with this situation? If so would be really appreciative if you could give some tips to handle this situation.

Welcome @abrownhell! I experience the exact same thing as you the day after I MO - every single time. And it’s worse if I binge. For me, I experience the same things, but I also have difficulty looking people in the eye and my self confidence is shot. For me, the best solution has been to try to leave masturbation behind. That’s why I’m here on NoFap. I left P behind back in 2009. But MO has been difficult to conquer. I’m making a lot of good progress here. What is your goal?

On a side note, can you please edit your original message to take the word “autistic” out? The context you use it in could be extremely disrespectful to autistic people who use this forum. I’m sure you didn’t mean to be disrespectful. So please edit it or I will have to delete the message (I can’t edit text as a moderator assistant, I can only delete. Thanks.

 

[+TenPercent]

Hi everyone, really excited to be on this forum. I am 35 yo male residing in Sydney, Australia. I used to be a regular Fapper (Once everyday) back in my early and late 20s with not much issues (atleast I thought so). Roughly 2-3 years back I noticed that whenever I fapped exactly 24hours later I would get extremely depressed. The depression is such that it creates a lot of negative thoughts (self loathing), aggression/anger (Parents especially my poor mom is my prime target to vent anger) and anhedonia. Its like masturbation started bringing a very villianous side of me. I am naturally a calm, easy going guy but somehow masturbating even once a week or month now brings the exact same symptoms every single time. I have been to a psychiatrist and he thinks I could have genetic mental issues which frankly I think is bollocks since I am mentally doing alright in a challenging work environment and in general. Its only when I masturbate that I become kind of an autistic aggressive mental animal. Has anyone dealt with this situation? If so would be really appreciative if you could give some tips to handle this situation.

@abrownhell - same story here. I masturbated daily and it all but destroyed me. The derogatory term “wanker” or the Australian “flipwreck” fit me all too well.
I’ve been trying to get it under control for a decade now. I used to imagine that I could do it less … and enjoy it more. But for me, I have learned that just masturbating once will set me back and put me at risk of a full PMO relapse.
The only goal that makes sense for me is to never masturbate again. Still working on that one, but I’ve come a long way from the daily habit. I’ll probably be battling this for years to come.

So, welcome to NoFap and good luck!