Masturbation: Is it Wrong or Not?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Mikey200, Jul 16, 2015.

  1. Mikey200

    Mikey200 Fapstronaut

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    Recently, I've been getting a lot of divided opinions on masturbation. With pornography, everyone I've met has said its wrong and can lead to sexism and worse addiction. But when it comes to masturbation, some say its wrong while others say since you are not exploiting anyone else like you would do through a pornography or sex addiction, its healthy. Honestly, I think both sides make sense, but would still like some advice on the subject. What does the Nofap community think?
     
  2. Honestly, it's more than the issue of wrong or right. The issues surrounding PMO are so much deeper than that and I think that's what the nofap community understand.

    It's all about what PMO does to a person. It desensitises you from what is real. Of course, sit there and masturbate to women with fake body parts if you wish. We're not saying it's wrong, but what is it doing to you as a person, is the question. Of course, "your brain on porn" goes into it a lot deeper anyway, in regards to dopamine on the brain etc... But there's so much more to it. There are a lot of unresolved emotions which cause men to use PMO as a form as escape and stress relief, when we should be using natural remedies for such things, such as herbal tea, fruit, sport, exercise.

    At the end of the day, it fucks you up on different levels. You're linking touching yourself to watching other people get off, and then you expect to go away and have a perfect relationship with someone real afterwards?

    So it's more than just right or wrong, it's about the effect it has on the brain and how we view ourselves and even the opposite sex as well. Porn creates all kinds of weird and unnatural fetishes within people.

    There are many people who have developed abnormal fetishes, such as seeing humans bang animals etc... Porn did that to people... We were not born to have such inhumane desires. That is just one extreme of the effects of porn, but it's to point out the extremes, and then to also see how it trickles down into other, smaller parts of our lives as well. It's all the same spectrum at the end of the day, in terms of it's ability to damage us humans. It all starts somewhere.

    Best to avoid the shit altogether. I've never been a PMO addict. I'm doing nofap because I just do not wish to be a part of a pornographic lifestyle. I want to see woman in the purest way possible.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 18, 2015
  3. Masturbation is not healthy. I masturbated daily (or more than once per day) for six years without porn. Then became chronically addicted to masturbation for another thirteen years (twice per day on average). Then, I discovered (when I found someone to marry) that I wore out and completely ruined my penile sensitivity and rendered myself sexually inoperable.

    My government has a campaign that smoking "every cigarette is doing you damage". Well, I have to campaign, every time you masturbate (especially without lubrication), you are damaging your sexual organ.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 16, 2015
  4. Hi bro,

    Has your sexual sensitivity come back yet, or is this now a permanent thing for you?
     
  5. I don't know to be honest. The doctor has prescribed me powerful medicine (Avanza) to subdue my chronic masturbation addiction habit once and for all. Now my sexual desires, my hormones as well, under the medication are zero. But I can only check by finding someone else who can check me or who won't mind touching me in order to find out in the future if there's any return of sensitivity. Obviously, I cannot tell by touching myself.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 16, 2015
    AlltheRageBackHome likes this.
  6. Jmak290

    Jmak290 Guest

    I was 7yrs old when my mom got a call from school, playing pocket pool at school at my desk. Mom cornered me in the kitchen and threatened me with a knife and castration if I ever did that again.

    It's got to be wrong. It's effected, affected, infected my whole being. In fact, I'm in pieces over it all. Filled with shame. I'm broken for sure.

    In recovery, I'm trying to piece myself together. Connecting with the little guy in the kitchen, I need him, and he needs me, we've been separated for way too long. I, we need to be that whole person that I was born to be.

    Why was I so hooked on M at that age? Preoccupation with M.
    Please don't tell me it's all good. Please don't tell me it's healthy. Please.

    M has messed things up. I've messed things up. And now an adult I find it is high time to put away childish things, but I can't. When I hurt, I go to M. It really is an answer. When I feel lonely and abandoned, it's there to comfort me. When I done wrong, disappointed myself, M is there to help me accept the disipline I need.

    I'll administer my own disipline. Blister my butt with a ping pong paddle with one hand... And the other hand... Well... Seems I've Sexualized most everything in life. Shame even feels so good, under the influence of the porn mindset. Humiliation can carry me thru an orgasm. Water sports becomes a sport under the influence. But in reality the shame increases to toxic levels.

    Porn mindset, can drive one to places never thought possible, time to scat... Away from that mindset... Turn away, go back, DONOT ENTER, WRONG WAY!

    This is why I'm in recovery 12 step program. There is nothing good about M. What did I just say??? Nothing good??? Now wait one dog gone minute... M is just what the doctor ordered. Yea, right! Dr Ruth maybe.

    Thanks for letting me share.
     
  7. Calvinklein

    Calvinklein Fapstronaut

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    I am ruined by masturbation more buddy.. I dont have fast unlimited internet to watch porn all the time.. I used porn substitutes but most of the time it was plain MO..
    Never gonna do that again
     
  8. Mikey200

    Mikey200 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the replies,guys. I think I'll just avoid masturbation, even if there's no porn involved. I can't make a broad statement about what other people should do about it, but personally, I'm gonna say no to it.
     
    dr jam likes this.
  9. Temujin

    Temujin Guest

    I'm not going to comment on moral issues as that is a personal choice for everyone.

    Physically i think its bad for you. As is pornography.
     
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  10. Arley

    Arley Fapstronaut

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    It doesn't matter whether in the grand scheme of things it's wrong or right. What matters is it's clearly become a problem for us personally.

    In fact, trying to come up with an over arching moral/ethical/cultural theory of it will most likely lead to a relapse since I'll inevitably find "evidence" that says it's fine so why can't I do it then? It doesn't work that way. What's fine for some people isn't fine for others.
     
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2015
  11. Don Frank

    Don Frank New Fapstronaut

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    masturbation is good, but ejaculation is bad because it robs you of your energy.

    i used to practice masturbation without ejaculation in order to improve and recover my penile stamina which is long eroded after years of pornography + ejaculation

    i think NoFap community must understand that masturbation =/= ejaculation and ejaculation is what causes most troubles - anytime you ejaculate, you lose a lot of energy, and it weakens your organs, and reduces your libido.
     
  12. Knight Solaire

    Knight Solaire Fapstronaut

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    That is your opinion buddy. Most people have come to the consensus that mastubation is also wrong because it releases dopamine just like PMOing does. Maybe not as much (unless you're fantasizing), but it still keeps you getting your fix.

    Plus, mastubation without ejaculation is called edging here and it is a huge no no for fapstronaunts. It can also cause a prostate infection from semen build-up.
     
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  13. Arley

    Arley Fapstronaut

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    Couldn't disagree more
     
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  14. TwelveFoot

    TwelveFoot Fapstronaut

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    In addition to what @Sun Bro said, there's also what @Shadowscholar said toward the top of the page.

    I'm not going to say masturbation in moderation on its own is downright bad. But in my experience it's always gone hand in hand with porn. Can't have one without the other, so I'm going for neither.
     
  15. Temujin

    Temujin Guest

    I don't see edging as bad. But i would avoid doing it solo. Edge with a partner.

    Edging solo can damage sensitivity, especially if you do it often.

    I would recommend a full 90 day no touch policy to let your penis get back to base level. After years of PMO you might not even realise its been damaged or made less sensitive.

    So hold back on the edging for now atleast even if you disagree that its bad.

    You might find out that the inceased sensitivity makes everything even better.
     
  16. Captain B

    Captain B Fapstronaut

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    I don't think one can definitely say if masturbation (without porn) is good or bad in general just from their own experiences. It's an extremely personal thing and it's different for everyone. On this website you'll obviously get a lot of opinions saying it's bad, simply because pretty much everyone here has had bad experiences with it but I don't believe this holds true for everyone out there. I can imagine there are people who have a healthy relationship with masturbation, people who don't do it too often or too extreme in any way and don't use porn with it. Just because I developed an unhealthy relationship to it, doesn't mean everyone else will ultimately go down that same path.

    The problem is just that once you've reached a point where it's gotten addictive, it might not be possible to go back to a healthy way of doing it. Just as it is for any other kind of addiction. There are people who drink alcohol in moderate amounts and there are alcoholics who will never be able to go back to that. For me personally the question is just whether I've already gone too far and the only way is to stay away from MO completely or if I can go back to a healthy way of dealing with it.

    So my personal opinion is: I believe it could be good if it's done in moderation. I believe there's a way to do it without causing physical or mental damage to yourself. I just don't know if that would work for me now.
     
  17. Jodokus

    Jodokus Fapstronaut

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    @Jmak290 thanks for sharing your story! I hope you well and good luck on your journey!
    makes much sense to me:
    All the bad feelings we have when we pmo or bc of it or when we break a(nother) taboo - porn somehow compensates us for it and maybe we even become addicted to this kind of conflicting behaviour
    I have thought about the ways I deal with my bad conscience when watching porn
    1. ignore it / put it aside / cage it and loose myself to pmo
    2. response of defiance / become the bad guy and enjoy breaking all the rules
    Of course there's also the third, or many ways of avoidance!
    The second way is the best to identify myself with destructive things I see in porn and hence probably the most damaging to my personality.

    As for the original question I agree with AllTheRage and CaptainB that you can't answer it with yes or no. Masturbation is not a product of society like porn. I think NoFap and other forms of abstinence are personal decisions.
    I also think that abstaining from pmo and mo will give me energy and push me in so many ways.
     
  18. Ryszard Mazur

    Ryszard Mazur Fapstronaut

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    I so agree with Temujin

    well, masturbation is healthy, only I think that when you are on a reboot it tends to set you back and send you backwards to deep flatline and that flatline and the frustration that goes with it can cause you to relapse ... so ... I decided on a hard mode cause I feel like as I only start jerking it with no porn I will tend more quickly to come back to full blown PMO ...
    so ... hard mode is safer for me ... if my body needs to relieve itself it will probably soon do so via a wet dream, which is a great pleasure anyway and sth natural so it cannot be viewed as a relapse
    :)

    Besides I was on a period of hard mode and I recommend it strongly, then I visited my long not seen GF and the sex was much hotter, hornier, I wanted her more, could not stop fu*ki**g for hours, the boner was eternal and neverending and persistent so .... I guess the bliss of this good oh sooooo good sex rewards us for our abstinence and makes it so worth it !!!!!
     
  19. An other way to approach is asking: what is your motivation to masturbate?
    I have yet to hear a single one that is convincing.

    Porn is irrelevant
    Masturbation is irrelevant
    Objectifying is the problem:
    If you let go of objectifying: using / reducing yourself and others as tools to get "pleasure"
    Then neither masturbation or porn holds any attraction.

    But if you are unable or unwilling to see others as tools then I see little point trying to reboot or stopping one thing or another thing. What's the point in acting like an adult if you're unwilling to grow up?
     
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  20. Ryszard Mazur

    Ryszard Mazur Fapstronaut

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    With all due respect, JackStrident, it is an addiction and spares neither adolescents nor adults ... it is more how the brain is wired to go get some while the getting is good, our wiring playing a trick on us, our brain stem not discerning between babes and pixels... our million yrs of evolution did not foresee high speed internet and porn movies ... they are the new cocaine and heroine ... we need to stay away to enjoy a healthy life!! :)
    Salute you whereever U are :)
     
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