Masturbation: Is it Wrong or Not?

@Ryszard Mazur I think you misunderstand me: I do think ultimately this is a matter of emotional maturity. And I bet most men go to their graves with little more emotional maturity than adolescents. If I hadn't gotten my shit together I can easily see how I would have stayed stuck objectifying till death did me part.

I am not saying that porn is not horrific, only that it is the inevitable scum on the swamp created by masturbators, no masturbators = no porn... it has no reason to exist. Likewise ppl who are not using themselves or others as tools to get off (e.g. objectifies) have no interest in masturbating... so irrelevant only means that in my struggle with objectification P M and O simply don't matter...

I am just not interested in that dumb state of mind that looks to score, get while the getting is good, whether it be porn, pure fantasy, pure self stimulation, actual babes, whatever. If I ever do have sex, and I have no problem if I never do, but if I do, it will be because of an amazing connection I felt with some woman, who need not even be that attractive at this point, because now I am rebooted that really does not matter, in fact I even mistrust it, like any reasonable person mistrusts a used car salesman.

 

lol!

 

I masturbate every about 7-21 days when the urges get really strong , because I do not have wet dreams and was told my urologist that as a male I need to release seamen every so often or that leads to prostrate problems and where I live in the middle of nowhere NW FL there are no good female partners . I would do 90+ days of hard mode but I have not seen any evidence that never releasing seamen or over 3 months is not harmful in fact the urologist I went to told me exact opposite.

 

Check the science yourself it is not conclusive. It sounds very sensational to say that ppl below 40 have a 20% increase in risk of prostate cancer if they ejaculate less than other men.... but then the risk of getting prostate cancer below 40 is so close to zero that one wonders if that 20% variation in that tiny fraction of risk is actually significant or not... and in the end all men get prostate cancer once they are older anyway and many MD's refuse to even test for it as they claim the false positives lead to more problems than just ignoring it.

Frankly if it was actually true that there was some significant risk associated with celibacy, like it truly increased my chances of illness or death by an actual significant amount (e.g. a couple percent), I would probably still take the risk. But in fact when you track celibate communities they have a significantly lower risk.

 

And I, for one, heard that jerking it often weakens the prostate!!

 

I know someone who has been celebate his entire life and is doing nofap and has never had prostate problem. He is in his 50s. There really is no evidence for what your doctor says. Just because he is your doctor doesn't mean he knows everything.

Also, saying there is no good female partners is really generalizing. I'm sure there are plenty of nice women where you live. You just probably haven't looked buddy.

 

Now you have: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7242091?dopt=Abstract

 

Sorry Buddy no good women here. The tri-county area has a population of under 30,000 most of which are older couples . I live 30 miles round trip from the nearest gallon of milk and 140 miles round trip to nearest walmart. This is the middle of nowhere Northwest Florida Ups cannot overnight a package here media com does not run cable down my road to due to a major lack of permanent residents . If you take the road I live on to the east from me you hit 2 small towns and then 180 miles of nothing pine trees.

 

@pmNO!! ... is there a reason you stay there and haven't moved on?

 

Also, no offense, but how do you have a addiction to porn if you live out in the middle of nowhere?

 

uh we still have internet high speed in fact. It's DSL over the phone lines with up to 4 mb/s they claim. And, lack of women has fueled that addiction for years. I stay here because my computer business is here and I like the hunting fishing wildlife and gardening .

 

Uh all that talks about is prostrate cancer. the sole reason I went to the urologist is because I couldn't urinate hardly at all. He told me that my lack of using the prostrate (I hadn't released in over 90 at all no wet dreams even) was not good and had caused problems with my sphictner muscle be able to move it properly it due lack of erections, bowel movements and my 12 cups of coffee a day dehydrating me and that using it every so often was good preventing prostrating infections , enlarged prostrate and other prostrate problems in fact he never even mentioned cancer .

 

The human body is incredibly complex and there are MANY reasons that contribute to prostrate problems. Do you drink enough water, do you eat Avocados and other fruit and veg regularly? It's a matter of taking care of yourself in general. There are monks who live the semen retention way as a lifestyle and have no problems whatsoever. Why? Because their lifestyle and what they put into their bodies is healthy.

As men, we do not need to masturbate... At all. I'm confused as to why this whole prostrate debate/argument still exists. Lack of masturbation is not the issue. What becomes the issue is a lack of a healthy lifestyle in general. Many men in the Eastern culture live a semen retention lifestyle for years on end. It's normal for a lot of them. Over there, they take eating healthy and taking care of their bodies extremely seriously, unlike over here in the Western world where we are spoiled and literally treat our bodies like garbage. How we treat ourselves is the cause of problems, not the lack of masturbation.

 

I also live out in the middle of nowhere so am completely cut off socially but enjoy the beautiful countryside.

Though I am trying to start my own business so I can afford to move out and get my ass to the city.

 

Ok but the simple fact remains that priests and other celibate communities as @AlltheRageBackHome mentions do not have more problems in fact they have less. It is of course hard to prove what causes what. And I expect that these ppl take their health more seriously in general. But there seems to be no reason to be concerned.
BTW: now that you're fapping again are your problems gone?

 

It's all a personal choice honestly. If you are blaming the fact that you are fapping on there are no good quality girls, that is a load of lies to yourself. You are deceiving yourself to rationalize your decision. I am not saying if it is right or wrong, but the matter of the fact is that for me I feel it is wrong. I have seen what it does to me, how it makes me feel, the guilt, remorse. It doesn't seem right to me. The truth is, science can't back up one claim or another on the occurrences of prostate cancer. In 1883 there was a report that came out when it was initially being discovered. I quote "it was a very rare disease." How can we say one way or another? The evidence is weak on both accounts. But I do know for a fact that in 1893, porn was not a big issue. They didn't have the inter webs and billions of exposed fantasies, videos, and images at a finger tips click. Whether you believe porn, masturbation, are wrong or not is a matter of self-decision. However, the way it makes me feel, the damage I might be causing to my body by doing something that definitely was not originally designed for, makes me want to take my fabstronaut suit and fly to the moon. That life of being older and addicted to porn, for me, disgusts me. I do not want that to be me, what defines me, dictates my decisions and work, or is even a part of me. I am excited to be here.

 

Unfortunately, for most addicts, pornography and masturbation go hand in hand, along with a number of other compulsive rituals. It is extremely difficult to give up porn and maintain a healthy masturbation habit. Our brains just don't work that way. From a psychological point of view, both habits reinforce each other from the stimulation we get from them together. From a recovery point of view, you need commitment and sincerity to recover from this addiction. You can't say you'll give up one and engage in other unhealthy habits. If you do that, your recovery is doomed for failure.

By the way, I don't believe masturbation in moderation is bad. It is actually healthy from a physical point of view. But it just does not fit into a healthy recovery.

DS.

 

The thing about science and research is that it takes A LOT of it to equal any sort of truth in how we see the world. There is not enough evidence on either side to actually say FOR SURE that PMO is bad or good. We have a bunch of experiences from people who stopped PMO, but that still doesn't mean that their experiences will translate to other people's experiences. It doesn't mean it won't either. The truth about PMO is still unclear but what is clear is that we have a community of people who don't want to watch porn anymore and a good number of people who have had great experiences when they stopped PMO.
In my opinion PMO is fine when it's done in moderation. Anything in moderation is fine for you, but since PMO can be addicting, it has the tendency to get out of hand. Is it bad as in morally? No. It's just a thing we can do. Unfortunately, it feels so good that we can do it too much and that can be damaging. I'm sure when there is more research done on this topic the results will show more conclusively that too much masturbation is bad for your well-being.

 

Personally I believe masturbation is neither good nor bad. It's just rubbing until a threshold is reached and the seed is spread. At a young age it helped me understand my body and what things were for and what they did. It only became an issue when it got tangled up with porn and became a compulsion. In that case it's essential I take it back. My point is that it's what's behind the masturbation, the intent, and what you're trying to achieve that governs whether it's negative or positive to your mental and physical health. But no I don't believe that masturbation is intrinsically bad. It's like saying kicking is bad. Kicking is great if it's a ball and your playing soccer. Not great if it's directed towards someone's shins. Okay I've officially lost it. Time for bed.

 

Sorry im late to post. From my experience with MO after a full 90 day reset, yes I believe MO and M solo are bad. They drove me straight back to relapse and gave me awful performance anxiety with a partner. Still had PIED while MO'ing after 90 day reboot. MO eventually lead me to PMO relapse.

Now just over 6 months in on my second reboot, with only 3 events of MO, I have no performance anxiety with a partner and no little to no symptoms of P induced ED. And no desire to be involved with P whatsoever.

In my opinion, Yes, M is bad. If getting away from solo sex is your goal then you must cut out the M as well.

CHEERS