meditation advice

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by blacklabel92, Mar 19, 2021.

  1. blacklabel92

    blacklabel92 Fapstronaut

    any meditators here that can give ya boy some tips? im juss starting out. my main process right now is light sage start timer for 5 to 10 mins, start meditation, recite my gratitude (what im grateful for, recite my 2 mantras, then finish off with my breath count from 1 to 10 then repeat till the timer goes off. my problem now is not wanting to go for 10 mins, maybe cause im lazy, ive been shooting for 5 mins lately. anyway i can look more forward to meditating. i want to enjoy it it like ive come to enjoy cold showers.
  2. I used to be into meditation, but I realize as a Christian and experiences I had because of it that it was not good for me. Meditation is a very religious thing that you should look into before doing it, just make sure it is the route you really want to go down.
  3. Slimjimjones

    Slimjimjones Fapstronaut

    I wouldn't say it has to be a religious thing, if anything I'd say it's just practicing mindfulness. If your having trouble to go a period of time I feel like your mindset or routine around meditation might use some tweaking, maybe try to be more detached about it? Like a period of intense focus (heartbeat, breath) to letting your thoughts and emotions flow over like a wave and simply exist. Just some thoughts!

  4. I am not religious at all and I like to meditate. A good one for a restless mind that wanders alot (which can be an affect over too much pmo) is to use a mantra. Using words that don't mean anything to focus the mind on the present. The reason they should be meaningless is because we want to not feel/think too much here. For example, when I inhale I chant "om", hold the breath and chant "ah", then exhale and chant "hung". I find this very effective when doing a walking meditation alone. Other mediation I do, bit like yourself, is the counting of the breath 1 to 10. I do that three times while focusing my attention on one spot across the room. After the third count I just continue to focus on the breath and the spot until my timer goes off after ten minutes.

    Another good one is the loving kindness meditation. Start off with being kind and loving/forgiving yourself. Then extend that to your family/friends while thinking of them. Then keep extending it out to other people you know until you are thinking of people who caused you harm or you just plain ol don't like. Then the whole country/world/universe. It's a great feeling looking for and letting go off any bad feelings you have towards others. It can be somewhat liberating if you mean it.

    Good luck with the practice!
  5. Redemptionisrequired

    Redemptionisrequired Fapstronaut

    Try the app headspace brother. He teaches well, you can start with a basic guided meditation and move your way to more and more quiet and unguided time.
  6. ElSabio

    ElSabio Fapstronaut

    Try John Vervaeke on youtube. He does a guided meditation and is an excellent teacher. Vipassana is not a religious practice. It is paying attention to your mind. Wandering mind and trouble concentrating are part of the practice.
  7. Retentionman

    Retentionman Fapstronaut

    My routine is 2 rounds of meditation daily. One in the morning and one in the evening.

    I learnt this practice from an audiobook called "Stress less, accomplish more" by Emily Fletcher:

    Each practice takes me around 10-20mins and it's divided in 3 aspects: mindfulness, meditation and visualization.

    I seat on the floor cross legged, spine erect and my hands on my knees with the most common mudra. Starting with a few minutes doing mindfulness, covering all your senses one by one. After that comes meditation itself on my mantra, which can be any word basically, this is the longer part. After that comes visualization, which is the part related to your goals. That's it.

    I want to incorporate another type of dynamic meditation which is calles Qigong, but I'm still hoarding info on the matter to learn properly.
    ElSabio likes this.
  8. ElSabio

    ElSabio Fapstronaut

    Qigong/taichi and mindfulness work better together. They feed each other. Find a class and a good teacher for qigong. It's really tough if not impossible to learn it without personal instruction.
  9. jun007

    jun007 Fapstronaut

    Hi Bro,
    I am a meditator for 3 years. I started out when I realized stress was the major reason I looked for PMO, and meditation was believed to be a way to calm the stress. So I gave it a try. It works for sure, I had a record for not masturbating for more than half year, although later I did it again, but I am sure I am improving.

    I started using headspace. It's a great app and I really enjoyed it. Also, you don't have to be religious to do meditation. But I am a bit different. After I used headspace for about 6 months, I felt I couldn't advance in meditation, so I started going to a Buddhist temple for better training. Later I even joined two 7-day meditation retreats. I was an atheist before but I am now not against religion any more. My current daily routine would involve morning prayer and evening sitting. I normally sit for 45 mins at night, but it could span from 20-90 mins depending on how much time I have.

    Lastly, just give it a try, any meditation is good meditation if you have right mind and commitment. Good luck!
  10. Lost_forever

    Lost_forever Fapstronaut

    I use an app called "waking up". I highly recommend it because it offers guided meditation where someone is waking you through the meditation, which helped me a lot. Now I can meditate for up to 15 minutes with no problem, I don't even notice its been 15 minutes until the timer rings. You get the first 6 guided session free and then you can choose to pay for access to the full version, if you can't afford it you can contact the company and see if they will just give it to you for free as that is what they advice to those who can't afford the app. Give it a try im sure it will help you.
  11. I have also experiences some negative effects while meditating during a flatline. Could you expand a bit on the experiences you had that were not good for you?
  12. Honestly its mostly religious reasons for me, I went through a dark night because of it.
  13. Coolbreeze

    Coolbreeze Fapstronaut

    Meditation does not have to be done through actual meditation brother. It can be as simple as taking a bike trip and focussing on your breath, it feels awesome. Any activity you find relaxing, do it mindfully. Eating is another such example, we usually eat quickly and get busy with our day but if you take the time to enjoy your bite; you will realize what you've been missing out on all this time.

    Multi-tasking is definitely over-rated and in my opinion, so is actual meditation. I just meditate in my activities and I love it ;)
  14. ElSabio

    ElSabio Fapstronaut

    Were you doing TM? I do vipassana and it's just focusing on breathing, noticing and labeling the thoughts which arise and refocusing. Nothing religious about it.
    The Passenger likes this.
  15. Meditation is serious business once you get deeply involved. It's not to be taken lightly. Meditation is a mental skill, which can be trained and perfected and which can have enormous effects on the body and mind. As any other skill you want to get good at, the right teacher (how to do it) and philosophy (why to do it) it are paramount.

    I will give you my opinion from a buddhist perspective, as they have been perfecting this skill for quite some time (+2000 years). Theres two types of meditation, tranquility meditation and insight meditation. Tranquility helps with calming and focussing the mind. Insight helps with getting rid of craving and aversion for physical and mental phenomena on a deep level of the mind. Both types are developed in different levels depending on the natural tendencies of the meditator.

    As such, training this skill from a buddhist perspectice and philosphy is the perfect tool for nofap, as it directly eradicates craving of any kind.

    What most people refer to as vipassana is insight meditation. The two types can be learned in any vipassana retreat worldwide. I have personally attended 3 10-day retreats.

    Feel free to PM for more info.
  16. Thanks for the information. I was recently meditating more seriously during my flatline, and I noticed it seemed maybe to increase a sense of 'depersonalisation' or 'derealisation' in my consciousness afterward. It's hard to explain, but it made me feel kind of spaced out and disconnected from myself not in a good way. This was after meditating for perhaps an hour each day - although during the meditation itself, I often felt quite peaceful.

    Do you think meditation can have this kind of negative effect? It made me a little wary of going to a 10-day Vipassana retreat.
    Matthew 2 likes this.
  17. Meditation can have all sorts of effects on body and mind. You perceived it as depersonalisation simply because thats how you perceived that experience based on the knowledge you have. If you meditate a lot without having a fixed framework/ frame of reference and without knowing where you want to go or what you want to develop then these things can happen..

    This is where the buddhist perspective and teachings come in. They provide you with that frame of reference and knowledge to handle these things. What you experienced was a change in consciousness and perception. Within the buddhist perspective these things happen, just as feelings change, sensations change, labels change, thoughts change, and so does consciousness change. It is not negative, nor positive, it is just change. You remain equanimous to the change. It arises. It passes away. Thats what you should focus; on being mindfull of the things that arise and pass away. And thats how you walk that path. Thats how you free yourself from lust and craving. All this is explained in the "noble eightfold path".

    Most people already realize this on a superficial level. But not in a deeply experiential and cognitive level. And thats what the buddhist path is all about. Realizing that truth about the world through your own effort. Realizing that all phenomena arise and pass away and that there is no need to get attached or react on any of these things.

    Your experience might have been scary because you didnt have the knowledge on how to handle it. Thats the danger. Other people have different experiences. They start seeing or hearing things. This also is explained and is not something to be feared or enjoyed. If you do not have the knowledge of how to handle these situations then bad things can happen because you perceive them as bad things. Or you might think you are the next messiah because you had a wonderfull vision... Its a self-fullfilling prophecy.

    So dont be so quick to judge your experience as "bad". Bad is just a label. And labels too, arise and pass away.

    I hope this helps :)
  18. jun007

    jun007 Fapstronaut

    Agree, I think the practice of mindfulness is a good thing in general. I am a bad multitasker and multitasking makes me stressful most the time. I practice eating and walking mindfulness as much as I can. Basically just eat in the dining room without phone, or take a walk and be mindful of body movement and sensations. It helps. Especially when it's crazy with working or during rainy days.
  19. Time, it's all time.
  20. Buddhism Is True

    Buddhism Is True Fapstronaut

    Explore the link in my signature.

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