Monk Mode Suggestions??

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Dr. Howard, Sep 14, 2020.

  1. Dr. Howard

    Dr. Howard Fapstronaut

    Hello everyone unfortunately I've relapsed again for probably the 500th time over the course of 4 years or so doing this challenge and I'm wanting to try out Monk Mode but I'm afraid I won't go through with it because I've tried it before and I just say screw it after a couple of weeks.

    My goal is to eliminate pointless time wasting activities such as tv, Netflix, YouTube, video games etc.

    I have a huge addiction to YouTube, Netflix and television and most of my relapses come from seeing something triggering on YouTube or Netflix. The problem is I live in my parents house and they have a smart tv that has Netflix, YouTube and every app imaginable. Every time I sit in my family room I get triggered to pick up the remote and start scrolling away. I CANT STOP!! It's extremely frustrating.

    I managed to get rid of my smartphone because of too many temptations but I really don't know what to do anymore about my tv and laptop. I do have a blocker on my laptop but it's pointless because I always just bypass everything using a proxy website.

    How can I do Monk Mode without giving in to the temptations? Usually I go a week or maybe a couple of weeks but then the longer my streak is the more likely I am to say screw it, I'm going to watch YouTube. Then YouTube leads to a relapse. It's an ongoing cycle over and over and over again. I always lose motivation and drive as I continue with my streak. Please help me fellas, this demon is ruining my life.

    PS... Im 25 years old and I've been having this problem since I was around 10. It just seems like I have no discipline in my life. I can't do what's necessary to stay sober. I meditate for 45 minutes a day, read books and sometimes I exercise but this screen addiction I have is taking the life out of me. My longest streak was 106 days hardmode.
    Fridaytaurus likes this.
  2. alphakadabro

    alphakadabro Fapstronaut

    So you already have a lot of experience going 106 days and I can tell you've thought a great amount about strategies already.

    The good news: You live with your family. This is a blessing for your recovery. Why? Because you have people to socialize with and a way to eliminate isolation.

    Do you relapse in the living room with other people around? Probably not.

    Do you relapse when your bedroom door is wide open? Probably not.

    So my first advice is to never accept privacy. Always be with your family. Volunteer to help them. Take the initiative to talk to them and do things together. And never shut your bedroom door and lock it. Always keep the door open so that you break the isolating privacy that leads to relapsing.

    The basic idea is that you should leverage whatever strengths are in your environment to your advantage. Exercise more, take lifting seriously. The more physically exhausted you are, the more centered you will be. And it gives you perspective and distance from your urges.

    And then build offline activities, hobbies and interests. Call friends on the phone, go out in-public and be present with nature.

    I wrote more advice in a post here:
  3. better123

    better123 Fapstronaut

    I too Faced the same problem : triggered by youtube.

    I think You Can Keep Yourself busy all the time. Plan Your Day and keep doing something constructive all the day...This will obviously make not lift the TV remote again. Whenever you feel an urge to scroll in the Netflix, tell your mind, that I have to read this, or do that, or exercise...etc.
    Challenge Yourself with Something. Set goals...because goals can keep us working. When i feel to watch youtube, I say " No I can't waste, i have to score well in the upcoming exams"..The harder the challenge, more will be the required focus, so lesser will you to distract.

    Once you have you make a habit of keeping busy, the urges for youtube and Netflix slowly fades away.

    Stay Strong Sir... :)
    Franky Baby likes this.
  4. Kvothe The Bloodless

    Kvothe The Bloodless Fapstronaut

    I think this is the best advice anyone can give you, IMO. The whole "don't accept privacy" thing works, and even though it will be frustrating at the time e.g. "I want to peek at Youtube but my parents just won't leave the room argghh!", it will pay dividends in the long run. And in a shorter time frame than you might think!

    Sometimes, the length of recovery is exaggerated due to peeking, edging, watching and eventually relapsing. But if you just remind yourself that the stricter you are with this, the sooner your recovery will come. The less disciplined you are, the longer it will take.
    Franky Baby and alphakadabro like this.
  5. alphakadabro likes this.
  6. I've been leaving my door open at night so I have zero privacy. It's working tremendously.
    alphakadabro likes this.

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