Monthly fap

Hi friends, how are you doing? First of all I'd like to thank all of you for the advice and support you gave me. I think each one of you is here for the same purpose as me: to help and to get help, and that's really great!

Now, actually starting the thread, I'd like to ask your opinion about what would be the harm of a session of masturbation at the end of the month. Do you think that would be a problem? Hang on, I'll explain my reasons, I think that the context of my life makes it acceptable.

I stopped with all the porn since May and I've been trying the Hard Mode (no PMO, trying to achieve my life goals, you know that). That really brought some benefits like more self-confidence, more self-control, more self-awareness, and, of course, a lot of free time to invest in myself. I've had only a few resets, because sometimes I was thinking or dreaming too much of sex and I ended jerking myself. However, I jerked mainly to avoid porn, and at least in this task I was successful.

Nowadays, avoiding porn is not a big deal for me (praise the Lord, it's a miracle!) and my greatest challenges now are to follow my career plans and to control my horniness. I don't think I am cured from my addiction, but I've developed a significant awareness, and it surely prevents relapses. I was never a player, and I don't know if being a monk will help me achieve the goals I value in my life. Of course it would be more natural and rewarding if I had a loving partner, but crawling for someone's love and attention is not among my goals. So what do you think? What would be the harm of a monthly fap? At the end of the month, as a way of self-love and relieving lust. Is that reasonable?

 

Thanks man! I agree that it should be a good thing to reward me with something else, but sometimes I think that there are some circuits in our minds we should use eventually. I can stay a long time with no PMO, but it always comes to a moment when I feel so horny that the amount of energy I use to distract myself doesn't seem justificated. I'm still not sure if this is an unavoidable condition, so I'll try to not masturbate for a little longer. I don't think this suggestion I made was a way to deceive myself, but a possibility to find a balance with at least masturbation.

 

It makes sense. I think people who have addictions should stay totally clean for a long time so the brain can "forget" the feeling brought by the previous compulsive act. For things we haven't evolved to, like drinking alcohol and sniffing cocaine, I think this period would be forever. For others, the limit seems uncertain.

There is a little list of highly addictive things that we do not naturally know, leading to substance use disorders. There are also some less addictive things which do not involve substances, like playing video games and using some smartphone apps, and could compose a still young and not so well accepted term in science, called "behavioral addictions". In both cases, I think we can just stop the habit forever, and none of them would be missed

But someone can be very young and have never been fed and still feel hungry. Likewise, I think that someone could never have seen any other human being and still feel sexual arousal.

I think we've developed a fight against neurotransmitters like dopamine in here, but they're essencial to our functioning. Without enough of them, the brain is under-stimulated and atrophies. That's what happens in depression. Thus, the challenge may actually be to find natural and balanced ways to guarantee their production.

I have a strong conviction that there is no balance with something so artificial like pornography (at least for me). But I still don't have the same conviction with masturbation.

 

Thanks, dude!

 

Thank you! Indeed, these are better and more natural rewarding habits. I'll keep on trying to connect with things of the real world instead of easy escapes. I haven't given up on no PMO yet.

 

Well, I don't know yet. Let's find out. I'll tell you if it works, but I don't intend to test this hypothesis anytime soon.