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Moving forward.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by meijii, Nov 1, 2018.

  1. meijii

    meijii New Fapstronaut

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    Hi all, I'm Meijii, and today, November 1st 2018 I'm going to be pushing myself as hard as possible to drop this addiction completely.

    I've got a couple reasons: 1. PIED is not fun, 2. significant other has been supportive and I want to make her proud, and 3. honestly it's a pathetic crutch to me. every time I watch I get depressed, I feel empty and sad and the enjoyment has virtually vanished. I'd say though the biggest issue for me is the PIED, which I'm led to believe also could be performance anxiety (??? any good ways to determine this?)

    I'm 20 years old, non-religious, live in Florida USA but originally from Seattle WA, been addicted since age 11 and I'm hoping I can write this addiction chapter off forever, because it's mild in comparison to most addiction cases but still not a pretty one.

    I take a health and wellness approach too; it's negatively impacting my mental state and making me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I want to bring some self-love and life back into myself and I see dropping PMO as a way of reaching this.

    Can anyone recommend some ways to counter urges?? I always fall prey to relapsing and as such, each time I do I make it increasingly more difficult to reach any pornographic content. I can only do so much before I'd basically throw my laptops away :)

    Also, on a more personal note, does anyone have experience curing PIED simply through PMO abstinence and intimacy with significant other?? I don't want to stunt healing by trying anything with someone near and dear to me. ^^
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2018
  2. drac16

    drac16 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to NoFap. I hope you enjoy your time here. One thing I would recommend is to control your gaze. If you go to a gym, there will be women working out in skimpy clothing; don't look at them. If you're watching football on TV and a cheerleader appears on the screen, look away. If you're at Wal-Mart and you're at the checkout aisles, you know that there will be magazines, so be careful to not look at them.

    If you don't control your gaze, you're going to become more addicted to lust, which will only lead to more masturbation.
     
    meijii likes this.
  3. Hey, welcome, man. Like @drac16 said, I've found that averting my gaze is helpful. Women in yoga pants are everywhere, and to be perfectly honest, I'm not able to pull my eyes away every time, but I'll often see a good looking female and think, "just this one, I'm just not gonna look at this one," and it helps to strengthen the muscle.

    Also, get really connected here. If you don't have a journal already, I would highly recommend you start one and post in it daily. Also, use the PMO tracker. It helps with accountability. And reach out to people. Encourage folks who are struggling... and encourage folks who are succeeding. Kindness and support go a long way in recovery. But yeah, get connected. As they say, "the opposite of addiction is connection."
     
    meijii likes this.
  4. You're in the right place. I agree with the above. Looking at posts from people who have succeeded in avoiding PMO for long periods have good insights into how to avoid falling again, but ultimately it comes down to YOUR will power in changing your thoughts, your gaze, and your determination in avoiding what is causing you physical, emotional, and spiritual pain...
     
    meijii likes this.
  5. meijii

    meijii New Fapstronaut

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    And it's weird because my addiction has added to a depressive state that saps me of my motivation, willpower etc. It's hard to stick with something when all my emotions feel fake or staged. Of course that's not really a problem I would have solved thru NoFap but it's important to note that it's emotionally difficult to determine what willpower even is at times.
     
  6. Good luck for your reboot!
     
  7. Yes, I entirely relate. Addiction absolutely saps willpower and motivation. That's why we need the group. Or at least that's why I need the group. The group can supply the momentum when we're just not emotionally/spiritually up to the task.
     
  8. It is a problem NOFAP will help you solve. those symptoms are due to the lack of dopamine while you are withdrawing from this addiction... it is normal. this process takes such a long time that it's very discouraging and overwhelming, yet "sticking to your guns"/willpower is the way to beat it...
     

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