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Music as a loneliness crutch

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by ddraper, Jul 16, 2016.

  1. Jul 16, 2016 #1
    ddraper

    ddraper Fapstronaut

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    Music for me is a double edged sword. I use it to make me feel less lonely. Case in point, my house is empty and all my friends went home to see their families/romantic partners and I'm alone blasting Modern Baseball (mainly "Just Another Face"). And as the music starts to make me feel better I start thinking about the girl I like who I think either: loves me/is playing with me/both but it doesn't matter because she's hours away from me and I can't see her. And then I focus on the lyrics (and this is common with a ton of music about love) and I can't relate to them because we're not together and we've never dated, and there is no one from the past to pin them too either.
     
    ddraper, Jul 16, 2016
    ddraper, Jul 16, 2016
    #1
    Aman1712, ons.obb_swaha and SoulOf1Lion like this.
  2. Jul 16, 2016 #2
    newmi

    newmi Fapstronaut

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    I guess I kind of understand your feeling. Me too listening to music all the time 'cause 1) no girlfriend so love songs give me emotional exits 2) to cover the street noises 3) not to feel so lonely at home. But sometimes, wearing the headphone kind of deepening the loneliness, when I see people actually talking and laughing together while I am just alone.
     
    newmi, Jul 16, 2016
    newmi, Jul 16, 2016
    #2
    JimmyR, Aman1712 and ddraper like this.
  3. Jul 19, 2016 #3
    JimmyR

    JimmyR Fapstronaut

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    I feel this hard, but my situation is different. I play in a blues band with some old timers twice my age and you sir have a textbook case of the Blues. My relationship with my partner has been damaged by PMO and a few other personal issues I have and I type this to you on the couch while she lays in our queen sized bed in the other room. When she's awake it's like talking to a stranger who doesn't want to give me the time of day, she might as well be a thousand miles away. I spend hours a day thwacking licks on my dobro guitar and often it only seems to escalate my loneliness and worry. I start playing as a release and sometimes it ends with me weeping. I am hoping we're on the mend but music isn't helping my problems, it's just reminding myself that I am human, and an imperfect one at that. I want nothing more than to be holding her in my arms right now.
     
    JimmyR, Jul 19, 2016
    JimmyR, Jul 19, 2016
    #3
    ddraper likes this.
  4. Jul 19, 2016 #4
    ddraper

    ddraper Fapstronaut

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    Oh I definitely have a case of a case of the blues, this summer I've basically had to marinate in the past couple of years of decisions I made. Alot of that reflection is done with music, and it definitely compounds everything.

    It's kind of funny, I've heard people say that music often amplifies our emotions whether good or bad, and when we are in a very specific mood we play songs over and over again (at least I do) that reinforce our moods.

    I'm sorry to hear that playing the guitar isn't doing it right now, but hopefully some joy will seep into what you play.
     
    ddraper, Jul 19, 2016
    ddraper, Jul 19, 2016
    #4

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