I'm sorry for what you're going through still. Relapses are so painful no matter what their 'reasons' are for them. It sometimes does make it seem that they've chosen addiction over recovery...and over healing their relationships as well. I'm so happy for you that you've started school again, though. I think your new outlook is great, and you won't regret putting yourself first. Stay strong. Even though I know it's still difficult sometimes, you're doing great.