My desire for a secret sexual relationship

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Krillin1993, Nov 16, 2020.

  1. Krillin1993

    Krillin1993 Fapstronaut

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    I gave it up already. No need for a second partner, no serious relationship. You can do as much self work for yourself at the end it won't happen man, it simply wont. My pessimism saved probably my ass through all the years. I know men who are still paying alimony like my neighbour do. He lives next to my house and became an Alcohol Adict-half of his income goes to his 3 sons until their 25th birthday. Justice huh?
     
  2. AnthonyyVibess

    AnthonyyVibess Fapstronaut

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    Bro . . . I have brachial plexus palsy, I’m literally like a walking beast or Igor if you were to look at my silhouette lol. I’m not going to speak on your love life or experiences bc the reality is, i don’t know you. However, looks are like 20% of the battle lol and I’m a living testimony to that. The amount of girls i could’ve slept with blows me sometimes and 10/10 beautiful girls are definitely in the batch lol but like you i was heavy on porn which resulted in me being pessimistic and even full of anxiety abt how good or not good i would be at sex which in turn made my timing and taste in woman poor and made my chances of having intercourse very slim. And this made me to believe that all woman jus suck and are users and don’t care and blah blah blah.

    The reality is bro, they have standards. Standards in looks, mentality, life-purpose, finances, etc. Look at you though . . . You have zero lol “she doesn’t have to be extraordinarily gorgeous” to you they can be young, old, ugly, broke whatever. As long as they worship you right? Why in the heck would anybody “worship” (i think a better word would be “adorn” but hey that’s just my opinion lol) someone that can’t even present why they should be adorned. You have literally said nothing positive abt yourself and sure you tried to fake it til you made it at one point by exercising confidence but you obviously have none. GET SOME! People see right through the fake crap. And don’t give us the “I’m a nice, caring guy” lol we are ALL nice, caring guys. I’m one and i don’t mean that sarcastically. I’m one and i didn’t finish last. I have a great gf who adorns me. When i tell you she jumps on me reminds me she loves me and has been loyal i mean it! And I have no money (college student life), my body features are again beasts/Igor like, and i don’t really know what else bc i see myself as a catch despite those things lol. And we get it, you don’t find purpose in love or marriage or religion or any got dang thing . . . So tell us what do you find purpose in? That’s what really needs attention in your life not this hunt for some hardcore damn near abusive sex partner lol. Lastly, and all this is being said with love i hope you know that, but get some money in your pockets dude, find a hobby or hobbies that you’re good at. If it’s playing warlock and dungeons for money and you enjoy it do that. Anything. Something. It’s harder to see yourself as a loser when you have things that make you feel like “the man”.

    And again this is all love because i know that low self-esteem side i still struggle with it to a degree but you gotta get goin bro. You making matters worse on your self in a lot of ways
     
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  3. Krillin1993

    Krillin1993 Fapstronaut

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    Well said. I have my difficulties to believe in god. I have prayed my whole life. I feel envy about people who do believe in god. I guess they have it much easier to fight this addiction than I do. Do you feel those urges still today after such a long period of PMO addiction? I will end up alone too and I have no problems to be alone as well. It is like you said I dont trust woman. But at some point I am not sure if I do want to experience intimacy or not. People who have said that they dont need intimacy with someone always had a loving mother. But thats not my case. I have never experience real love not even from my parents, so I dont have a right to experience love, even if it is false love? Why? I was always hurt and rejected by woman because of their superficiality and their disgusting wishes to trick men in order to get money and build a family. Building a family was never my intention. Sometimes I wish to know a woman who has removed her uterus so I am less afraid of them when they begin to talk to me. It feels like almost every woman want a baby and wants to leave their beloved boyfriend. Man who can't offer things to a woman are thrown away like you throw trash in a garbage can. At least I feel like that. All laws works for woman in this western society. I dont feel valued on all levels of life. Of course I dont want to sound like Elliot Rogers but this is the truth and alot of things makes sense for me. People are afraid or hate misogynist but the bigger problem is the virus of misandry environment, which builds up silently and barbaric. And nobody dares to talk about this problem cause men are too proud to make it public. And thats why MGTOW was created for. Maybe I should quit the idea of getting sex from anyone else, you are right. But I am not sure if I can completely. First I have to give my addiction. Then I want to see how I feel when I have reached the 90 days mark.
     

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