My Experience With a Porn Star - (The Truth About ED & Fetishes)

Hi Ivanhoe,

I appreciate the kind words and glad my story is one you can relate to. There is one other book that is not related to porn per se but has been monumental in my recovery which is "Dating Essentials For Men". This book has really helped me get out into the arena of dating to replace the maladaptive fetishes with a healthy real world pursuit of women. In my experience there comes a point where more information is not the answer but rather implementing good information. If you take the contents of this book seriously and do the challenges you'll likely find that your recovery from your fetishes exponentially improve.

The map to success as I see it is to go from Intellectual Understanding > Emotional Embodiment > Physical Action. The more physical action I took in meeting new women the less I thought about any porn or fetishes. In fact I was very clearly able to see the illusion that porn and fetishes try to provide the more I was meeting women. So the best way in my experience to counteract fantasy has been to immerse myself in the reality. The more I was in real world experiences with women the more clear it was that these delusional fantasies just did not hold up in reality so it became much easier to parse the two. The inverse is also true, the more time spend in isolation the more the fantasies seem real. I highly recommend getting that book and doing a 30 day - 90 day sprint of just immersing yourself into the dating scene.

Its been transformative.

Best,
Self Actualized Men

 

Hey Tryingto,

Thank you for the kind words. As I mentioned in another post recently I believe their comes a point where more information is not the answer but instead the answer is acting on good information. Its not been my experience that we can logically/rationally think ourselves out of our addictive fantasies/attractions but what has proven successful for me is taking action. In taking action and meeting women in the real world this pursuit has replaced the need for relying on porn and the more real world experiences I've had with women the more clear it is that these "fantasies" do not hold up in reality. What has helped me exponentially is the book "Dating Essentials For Men" which is a guide for fundamental tools to help you get in the field. The more time I spent meeting women and take the lead role not only did I not think about my fetish or maladaptive fantasys but I genuinely was repelled by them. The way forward with through action.

I wish you the best on your journey my friend.

Best,
Self Actualized Men