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My failure

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by drquit, Jun 17, 2020.

  1. drquit

    drquit Fapstronaut

    11
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    Update guys!

    Fuck fuck fuck. So i made it hardcode 18 days. Then I went away to work for 5 days. Started before I left that I and wife took a shower, I hade very much improved erections, very hard and hard fast. I satisfied her orally and she sucked on my cock for like 1. min . Then the next day I was soooo horny. I started watch blogs bikini girls,,,,, then I started to watch nude girls pics, then I was like "whatever I already watch nudes and jerked off so I can do the porn also" so I did, MANY hours like 4-5 hours for 2 days. I jerked off (never came) and I jerked off so much until my cock was unable to get hard. Then I realized the huge difference without PMO (very hard, fast) to the opposite. I did not feel the "high on serotonin" feeling as I used to, rather dull after some time. was just nice feeling the precum edging. however when I came home I was a mess (my brain is still not foggy, feels like fogginess is due to after cumshut" but I felt very jealous. After watching a lot of threesome, cuckold, hot wife stuff I was extremely jealous with my wife and very angry and edgy. A total asshole. I realised that this porn make you to an jealous angry asshole.

    The following things I realized.
    1. The "high" feeling was not as good as I thought, rather dull
    2. Yes the erections was hard and it was very nice to edge VERY nice and I felt I could realise a huge load.
    3. The anxiety, feeling depressed and disappointed after the porn and jerk off was terrible, absoultuley terrible and it was NOT worth it.
    4. No cumshot and I did not have the foggy feeling in my head. I think cumshot causes foggy head.
    5. I was edgy, jealous and an asshole after watching porn and was very angry with my wife for minor things.
    6. I wanted to have sex with her but she said no since she said I have to reset and she was not very keen on sex due to my behavior. This made me more angry.

    The question is. After you have done hard mode PMO and u feel strong, healthy, good erections, morning woods (this is already back now after this 2 days back to hardmode, so it feels I'm not on square 1 but just a couple of days back) then it is maybe better to have sex with wife and release the cumshot in her vagina than just edge and get horny and end up in the dark porn world again?

    Any thoughts?
     

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