MarcoRabarbaro
New Fapstronaut
Hello to everyone,
I am here for asking help to someone who is in the same situation of mine, or simply to talk a bit about my situation and don't keep it just for me. I am sorry if I do some grammar mistake, but I am not an English mother tongue speaker.
This problem started 2-3 years ago while I was watching porn. At the time I had any idea about the findom existence, and when I saw a random video about it, a whole new word has been shown to me, and the sad thing is that I felt that was something that, unconsciously, I was craving for, like the right fetish for me.
Talking about my porn addiction it was not the highest ever, but my fap frequency by the way high. I started with soft porn and I conclude with bdsm and then findom. When I reached the findom level, in the beginning I was just enjoying watching on line video about it and fap meanwhile. Then I started to watch for findomme on facebook groups or in instagram and fantasizing about the domme in front of my eyes. The next step was contacting them, talking with them and than fade straigth away. The next level as you can imagine was to pay them.. Luckily, despite a lot of other people, I spent in total 30 euros in 2 times, so in this case I feel really lucky..Since I started loooking for dommes on internet I have stopped to watch porn.
So, what is bringing me here? I am totally obsessed about submitting myself to a girl in this way even if this is letting me feel like a worm. I still look obsessed to find the right sweet domme for me, contacting them, fading away etc.. It is like a vicious circle wave, some time I don't think to mutch about it, sometimes like now is obsessing me but I know that even if I feel better my fetish still there.. there is no escape, or at list I can not find it. I read stories about financial slaves where they really have spent huge ammounts of money and had ruined their life. Even if I still have not reach that point, I mentally feel like them: BROKE!
Had any of you experienced that? Of course my sexual life it is not really good even if I am not the ugliest guy ever etc.. I am 29 yo and I am a bit ensicure and shy..this is totally fucking up my life.. I don't know where to ask help because I really feel ashamed abut it and nobody really knows what it is or especially what there is beside of it..
Thank you for reading this, I am opened to suggestion or just to talking with someone about it. I really feel an huge rock over me.
Grazie!!
I am here for asking help to someone who is in the same situation of mine, or simply to talk a bit about my situation and don't keep it just for me. I am sorry if I do some grammar mistake, but I am not an English mother tongue speaker.
This problem started 2-3 years ago while I was watching porn. At the time I had any idea about the findom existence, and when I saw a random video about it, a whole new word has been shown to me, and the sad thing is that I felt that was something that, unconsciously, I was craving for, like the right fetish for me.
Talking about my porn addiction it was not the highest ever, but my fap frequency by the way high. I started with soft porn and I conclude with bdsm and then findom. When I reached the findom level, in the beginning I was just enjoying watching on line video about it and fap meanwhile. Then I started to watch for findomme on facebook groups or in instagram and fantasizing about the domme in front of my eyes. The next step was contacting them, talking with them and than fade straigth away. The next level as you can imagine was to pay them.. Luckily, despite a lot of other people, I spent in total 30 euros in 2 times, so in this case I feel really lucky..Since I started loooking for dommes on internet I have stopped to watch porn.
So, what is bringing me here? I am totally obsessed about submitting myself to a girl in this way even if this is letting me feel like a worm. I still look obsessed to find the right sweet domme for me, contacting them, fading away etc.. It is like a vicious circle wave, some time I don't think to mutch about it, sometimes like now is obsessing me but I know that even if I feel better my fetish still there.. there is no escape, or at list I can not find it. I read stories about financial slaves where they really have spent huge ammounts of money and had ruined their life. Even if I still have not reach that point, I mentally feel like them: BROKE!
Had any of you experienced that? Of course my sexual life it is not really good even if I am not the ugliest guy ever etc.. I am 29 yo and I am a bit ensicure and shy..this is totally fucking up my life.. I don't know where to ask help because I really feel ashamed abut it and nobody really knows what it is or especially what there is beside of it..
Thank you for reading this, I am opened to suggestion or just to talking with someone about it. I really feel an huge rock over me.
Grazie!!