My First Full Vent. Is There Any Point in Trying to Progress?

I'm not a professional. I can only tell things from my perspective and experience. I hope it will help and motivate you. Life is a struggle. It's difficult and sometimes you want to escape it's harshness, go somewhere safe from troubles. But it's hard to escape life. Loneliness, sadness, judgment always finds its way to a person. You can be passive, go somewhere safe, do nothing and overthink on this. You could do this for days, weeks, but eventually your rational part of the brain will tell you it is of no use. It's just a bunch of wasted time, it doesn't help and it's boring. What helps is to follow your conscience, to realise what you think is good and just (from justice) doing, to set your principles and to apply them to yourself but also to see others through them. For example there are probably things you could do that would make the situation better but are to lazy or disheartened to do. Despite this it's still not okay for your mother to be so negative, to spread negative propaganda and to make everything even worse. You can't change her but you could try to shift her negative discouragement into fuel of motivation. You may try saying to yourself something like "I know I'm not anything special, I know I failed a lot" but than encourage yourself, decide to defy her negativity with all your strength and all your heart. Not by words, more negativity or by arguing but by doing what you know is good and just and by your positivity, positive talk. Wake up every day and remember that you must be a fighter, a warrior, a hero. You will fight in your life for what you want, for what you love, for yourself, for us here. Work, sweat, struggle, do everything and anything you know to make everything better. Motivate yourself, inspire yourself, listen to inspiring music. Try and try and try, again, again and again and never give up even if you move from 0 to 0,1 in life. Even if you just change your thinking, even if you fail 100 times and still keep trying, even if you move from 0 to 0,1 in life, it will all be a triumph. Maybe small to those who judge you, but you and I will know that it was a glorious triumph! Live for these triumphs. Defy the negative sides in yourself and her negative propaganda with all your positivity, all your heart, all your dilligence, all your work and sweat. Because what else could you do? To live in some sort of passivity and to accept sadness, injustice and negativity? For how long will you have to endure this? Forever? Never! Be alive, live for triumph! Don't be afraid, go forward one step at a time, crawling if you have to! May every triumph, no matter how small it is fill you with joy and motivate you to work towards even greater triumphs! I know you can do this, I know you can win, I know you can triumph, I know you can triumph even from the worst circumstances!

 

I go bad people around me as I was growing up that always stated the negative side of everything I did not done right ,not done fast , not smart. I realized that these were the same people that were telling me that I could not do but at the same time I was doing for them. I felt bad about my self did not in joy life I was captive in a life were I kept trying to gain these peoples approval.you are at the age were the only person that counts ( unless you are married or have children) is you it is your time to easy on self inprovement . Schooling can be improved if you need more driving sessions take them it's your time and money. At this point your life is solely what you make it not you mother father or anyone but you! You need to make choices of were you want to be and what direction you want to go it will only depend on your commitment and only be impacted by your choices from now on. Good luck!

 

okay so while my case is not as severe do what she says. change little by little find out ways to improve, its tough but also you can start to learn skills at home too consider taking coding classes, mechanic classes, obtain your license and be an uber or lyft driver or start your own side hustle(legal).

 

Yes you have the right idea how never allow your self to


I feel so low that you don't go after what you want in life

 

Honestly I'm not surprised you are depressed....I would be too with a mother like that!

While its true that setting a goal doing something with your life IS important, it sounds like her attitude is really nasty. I don't know if this is a new thing or whether she has always been like that towards you? Either way having your parents tell you things like that is a very negative influence and of course you will not feel good if you are surrounded by that. I think maybe you should get any job you can just so you can move out and be away from that toxic relationship (I know a thing or two about toxic parents!).

That being said, you DO need to find something that interests you and motivates you. Something you enjoy and have a natural interest in. Qualifications aren't everything. Lots of people who became sucessful in later life left school with few or no qualifications, so don't use that as an excuse to write yourself off. Provided you are willing to learn, either at college, or on the job, or undertake training course or apprenticeships, there are LOTS of options open to you.
You are only 20 yet you are writing as if your life is over and you have no chance left to become anything. That could not be further from the truth, you have got your whole life ahead of you! Very few people know what they want to do at your age. I only figured out what I want to do about 2 years ago and I am 31!!! haha. So I went back to college as a mature student and started a new career. Loads of people do it, don't feel like you have to get everything right first time, because you don't and anyway the avarage person changes careers something like 6 times over their lifetime!

Your life is really not the hopeless pit of despair you might think it is. But like I said, you need to be around people that will be encouraging and positive and if your mother cannot or will not facilitate that then you should look at trying to find somewhere else to live because nothing positive will come out of living in such a negative environment. She might beleive she is doing it for your own good but being undermined and belittled by your own parents is not good for anyone.

 

"Is There Any Point in Trying to Progress?" Yes, there is. Every new day is another day to learn and to grow.

All of that, throw it out of your mind, right now. Never mind your obstacles, hurdles or haters. Your biggest challenge will always be yourself and that challenge is always in the heart, mind and soul. The only person that can hold you back is you. The only person that can make progress in your life is you.

For evidence, you, said that you skipped three interviews. You can't get the job if you don't show up. The fact that you had interviews means they saw something about you that they liked. Your mother nor anyone else prevented you from going; you did. I get the anxienty but you're the one not completing your driver tests; no one else is stopping you. I empathize with you because I've had similar experiences. I wasted a lot of time and screwed up a lot of chances by wallowing in my despair. Please, trust me when I say that your negative mental state is holding you back.

You're young, practically still a kid at your age. You have a lot of life and opportunities ahead of you. Find another interview, go to it and if there is an offer, take it. If you don't like it, stick with it until you find something you do like. Then stick with that for a while. Eventually, you'll get good at. That will give you less time to worry about your past (worrying is bad for your health) and eventually build confidence within you. In turn, your anxiety will fade. Also, you're at a great age to enlist in the military. I recommend the Air Force. They are laid back (compared to the other branches) and if you're interested, you still have time to train as a pilot. Think about it, you could be Tom Cruise in a jet, in real life!

 

I know a few people that went in to the military when they came out they were grounded and self-confidence.my cousins was in the air force when she came out went to college then worked for the IRS. Would not be a bad choice. Something to ponder.

 

Sick motivation post man, that is some good stuff