My first non sexual date ever

[modern milarepa]

All my dates usually ended up in sex or with a lot kissing and touching. Even first dates.

I had an argument with my girlfriend two months ago and we didn't talk since then.
Until last sunday we started talking again.

Yesterday I saw her, I knew she was tired from work and busy but made everything she could do to see me. We talked for 30-40 min. We ate and then she told me to go to her mother's house. I bought her an ice cream. When she gave it to her, her mother said I won half a wedding ring.

Now, I know more about who my girlfriend is, what she likes and some fun talk too. She told me she's been talking about me with her friends and mother, they all seem to like me.

Conclusion: By knowing the girl as a person I feel more comfortable with her, I know more about who she is and I enjoy her personality, it makes everything more fun, she is not just a lover now, she is starting to become a friend.

 

[p1n1983]

All my dates usually ended up in sex or with a lot kissing and touching. Even first dates.

That's amazing, keep doing that. people that have high attraction to each other do exactly that.

I had an argument with my girlfriend two months ago

Man that know how to talk to woman, don't argue with them. Comunication is key in a relationship. The more you argue, the worst your result are going to be. But if communicate instead of arguin the you are going to know more from were is she comming and you are going to know her better.

we didn't talk since then.

Amazing comunication skills. For 2 months you didn't speak to each other? how in the world is that a good relationship? Woman that are in love with you will reach out to you multiple times, every day. If she didn't do that then she is not.. no matter that she comes later an told you she is talking about you with her friends and mother.
Always see her actions, not her words. Her actions told me that she is not that into you, and your actions tell me that you are working to get her attention and been the nice guy.

Conclusion: By knowing the girl as a person I feel more comfortable with her, I know more about who she is and I enjoy her personality, it makes everything more fun, she is not just a lover now, she is starting to become a friend.

This is exactly what is going to put you in friendzone, no more lovers, just friends.

 

[modern milarepa]

words. Her actions told me that she is not that into you, and your actions tell me that you are working to get her attention and been the nice guy.

It was my fault I pushed her too much, so I was the cause of the argument. It was a mistake from my part. She forgot about it and I changed some bad attitudes I was having. That is why we are back together, mostly because it was a mistake from my side. I just wait until her anger pass.

This is exactly what is going to put you in friendzone, no more lovers, just friends.

You can't build a relationship on just sex. That is the mistake most men do, only making a relationship based on sex and chemistry and the end it's going to break, you can't have sex 24/7.

Nothing wrong with having a talk with your girl once in a while and to know her better.

 

[modern milarepa]

This is exactly what is going to put you in friendzone, no more lovers, just friends

I like sex but a relationship that is just sex is empty. I really appreciate moments in a relationship where we just hang around, knowing she likes me for who I am and not just my dick.

But I get your point, the things is you have to still portrait a masculine frame and not falling into a friendzone. But it has to be a balance you can simply treat a girl like a sexual being. She has feelings too and sexual desires of course.

 

[modern milarepa]

Tell me @p1n1983 how do you make a girl fall in love of you?

Do you have a wife? Girlfriend?
Are you dating?

What type of porn addiction or sex addiction do you have? If any

You just seem so knowledgeable I want to understand where all this you say comes from. Some books, experience?

Maybe I can learn more

 

[p1n1983]

It was my fault I pushed her too much, so I was the cause of the argument. It was a mistake from my part.

Is good that you took responsability for your mistake, but again, always comunicate, don't argue.

She forgot about it

She didn't, the way you make her feel is not going to fade away. If you make her feel the same way in the future, she is going to use it as an example of how you are hurting her again in the present.

I changed some bad attitudes I was having

This is good if you think that those are things you want to improve for you, and not to please her.

I just wait until her anger pass.

So, you were the one that rekindle things. She dump you an you were the one that worked to get her back. That is not how attraction works. Is your idea to get back together, not hers. Also she is going to have low attraction to you if you do things like this that make you look a little needy. Why? she dump you.. she considered that she was better off without you. A man that respect himselve will walk away and date other people. He is not going to work his ass off to be with a person that dump him. Is like trying to fix things with a friend that punched you in the face. Is his job to rekindle things like is her job to rekindle things with you after she dumped you. If her actions have no concecuences with you, she is not going to respect you. And if she don't respect you, she is never going to love you. Woman need to know that if they mess up with you, you are going to walk away.

You can't build a relationship on just sex. That is the mistake most men do, only making a relationship based on sex and chemistry and the end it's going to break, you can't have sex 24/7.

Nothing wrong with having a talk with your girl once in a while and to know her better.

Tell me @p1n1983 how do you make a girl fall in love of you?

Is not about sex.. is about she desiring you. When a woman is really attracted to you she is going to be happy to jump your bones all the time. Sex is only 10..20% of the time you spend with a person but it have to be there, if not then she is just probably not that attracted to you.. and you are not going to have the best girlfriend experience if she is not.

Do you have a wife? Girlfriend?
Are you dating?

Girlfriend, the best one I've been with. I'm in my best version so I was able to attract an amazing woman. She worked her ass off to make me like her, a woman that is constantly hit by other man (she is beautifull and have her shit together), she was the one working for my attention. I was different than all those desperate guys that worked their ass of the get her attention. I was just on my goals and ambitions, on my best version, been masculine and not desperate to lock her down to commitment. I took my time to get to know her before agreeding to be exclusive, of course she brough it up, it was her idea. She worked her ass of to be exclusive with me, and she works her ass of to make me happy and stay together in the present. That's the best girlfriend experience you can have, and you can only get to that if you work in yourselve.

What type of porn addiction or sex addiction do you have? If any

Never had an addiction but used to fap to porn in the past daily, part of working in myself was to reduce that consumption as much as I could. I did it and move on.

You just seem so knowledgeable I want to understand where all this you say comes from. Some books, experience?

Have a lot of experience as a nice guy and now as a more masculine guy that stand his ground and don't let people walk all over him.
Of course, I read a lot about it while I was working in myself and I started to understand why my "luck" with woman was not that good in the past. Once I started to be more masculine.. more of an alpha.. my dating experiences changed for the better. That's why I'm here to help guys that are like I was in the past and don't have a clue on how attraction works.
I always recomend: "How to be a 3% man from coach corey wayne" and all his material on youtube.

Tell me @p1n1983 how do you make a girl fall in love of you?

That's how my brain worked in the past. How can I attract and make a woman fall in love with me?
Today I changed the way I persive myself, now that i'm in my verst version I consider myself a good catch so I let woman (that are interested in me) to work to make me fall in love for them. I only do my part of the job as a man and ask them out and have good times together and of course have sex, people bond true sex, woman more than man, that's why sex is important in a relationship.

 

[modern milarepa]

She dump you an you were the one that worked to get her back

I didn't reached out to her, I was being judgmental for some traits of her personality, she is just a bit young and inexperienced and doesn't know how to handle a relationship, but now I get it's just who she is and I let her be she has improved and I learned to be more tolerant.

I simply went no contact. She reached out to me first and wanted to see me.

I used to be a little judgemental with a tendency to only see bad traits in people, now I'm more open to know the all person without preconceived ideas. I improved in that, I haven't told her. But our interactions are now more smooth because of it.

She tried to reached out a week after the fight and other times too. I needed some alone time too.

You seem to have good points @p1n1983. But your speech and analysis can lack touch and also you tend to isolate phrases and take them out of context to make a strong point about it without seeing the all picture ñ.

For example me telling I didn't have sex in one single date, then you tell me I'm doomed to be friendzoned, if you analyse the phrase with the first paragraph I told the girl was very tired she had to work extra shifts all week. But still she constantly texted me so we can see each other. I didn't want to push her, because she just look tired.

That is my only critique of you, you isolate phrases and take them out of context and it can sound just a way of you trying to win an argument. And you are simply giving an advice.

You also come too fast to conclusions without all the information and you make assumptions instead of asking or using facts about the problem at hand.

And also trying to put some things into a red pill rule can look a little cliché and not deep thought.

But I can agree with many things you say, but one thing is telling a true and another spitting a true in someone's face. Just try to speak in a less agressive fashion. People will listen to you more.

It's what I've seen in the page and your posts and my experience as physician dealing with people's problems every day. If you are rude or very direct even if you are right people won't listen.

Take care.
Hug.

 

[p1n1983]

she is just a bit young and inexperienced and doesn't know how to handle a relationship

Then she is not girlfriend material. Acepting her the way she is a good thing, but you can't change reality. If she can't handle a relationship, then you should move on to a woman that can handle a relationship. You can keep seen this woman while you are single but not in a commited relationship.

But your speech and analysis can lack touch and also you tend to isolate phrases and take them out of context to make a strong point about it without seeing the all picture

I don't agree. I just work with what people say and do.

I told the girl was very tired she had to work extra shifts all week.

I read that and that is BS. When a woman is really into you, she is going to have time and energy to see you. No matter how much tired she is, when she really is emotionally drawn to you she is going to do everything to be with you, emotionally and physically.
When a woman tell you that she is tired or have a headache just to avoid sex or seen you is a clear sign of lack of interest in you.

But still she constantly texted me so we can see each other.

She does that with friends too.

I didn't want to push her, because she just look tired.

I was exactly the same when I was a nice guy. After that I learned that if she was too tired for me, it wasn't the fact she was tired, it was because seen me wasn't that important to her. But when you are important in her life she is never going to be tired to see you or jump in bed with you.

And you are simply giving an advice.

At the end of the day, I'm here for that. People can listen to my advice or ignore me, is ok by me.

You also come too fast to conclusions without all the information and you make assumptions instead of asking or using facts about the problem at hand.

Again, i work with what people say and I can correlate what they are saying with my own experience and others. Of course, more details I have is easier to help.

And also trying to put some things into a red pill rule can look a little cliché and not deep thought.

Red pill comunity is full of guys that blame woman for their lack of succes with them.. and maybe with life. I more in the team of the self improvement, been more masculine and steping up to people in general.

But I can agree with many things you say, but one thing is telling a true and another spitting a true in someone's face. Just try to speak in a less agressive fashion. People will listen to you more.

I speak naked truth. I only have one text message to capture the OP attention to help him to wake up and work to solve his issues. Some people will run away from a mesage that direct, some are glad that I was so direct to them. I have my own way of helping and I think is the best one. Most people have the soft approach, I prefer this one. Is good to have different ways of haring the same message.

If you are rude or very direct even if you are right people won't listen.

It's ok by me. I'm not going to change my ways because people are too soft and can't handle the truth. Been honest and direct is a good trait in life, I don't consider that rude.

 

[p1n1983]

she is just a bit young and inexperienced and doesn't know how to handle a relationship

Then she is not girlfriend material. Acepting her the way she is is a good thing, but you can't change reality. If she can't handle a relationship, then you should move on to a woman that can handle a relationship. You can keep seen this woman while you are single but not in a commited relationship.

But your speech and analysis can lack touch and also you tend to isolate phrases and take them out of context to make a strong point about it without seeing the all picture

I don't agree. I just work with what people say and do.

I told the girl was very tired she had to work extra shifts all week.

I read that and that is BS. When a woman is really into you, she is going to have time and energy to see you. No matter how much tired she is, when she really is emotionally drawn to you she is going to do everything to be with you, emotionally and physically.
When a woman tell you that she is tired or have a headache just to avoid sex or seen you is a clear sign of lack of interest in you.

But still she constantly texted me so we can see each other.

She does that with friends too.

I didn't want to push her, because she just look tired.

I was exactly the same when I was a nice guy. After that I learned that if she was too tired for me, it wasn't the fact she was tired, it was because seen me wasn't that important to her. But when you are important in her life she is never going to be tired to see you or jump in bed with you.

And you are simply giving an advice.

At the end of the day, I'm here for that. People can listen to my advice or ignore me, is ok by me.

You also come too fast to conclusions without all the information and you make assumptions instead of asking or using facts about the problem at hand.

Again, i work with what people say and I can correlate what they are saying with my own experience and others. Of course, more details I have is easier to help.

And also trying to put some things into a red pill rule can look a little cliché and not deep thought.

Red pill comunity is full of guys that blame woman for their lack of succes with them.. and maybe with life. I more in the team of the self improvement, been more masculine and steping up to people in general.

But I can agree with many things you say, but one thing is telling a true and another spitting a true in someone's face. Just try to speak in a less agressive fashion. People will listen to you more.

I speak naked truth. I only have one text message to capture the OP attention to help him to wake up and work to solve his issues. Some people will run away from a mesage that direct, some are glad that I was so direct to them. I have my own way of helping and I think is the best one. Most people have the soft approach, I prefer this one. Is good to have different ways of haring the same message.

If you are rude or very direct even if you are right people won't listen.

It's ok by me. I'm not going to change my ways because people are too soft and can't handle the truth. Been honest and direct is a good trait in life, I don't consider that rude.

 

[modern milarepa]

When a woman tell you that she is tired or have a headache just to avoid sex or seen you is a clear sign of lack of interest in you.

Then again making assumptions, we have plenty of sex. It was simply a date in which I preferred not to have sex. She didn't told me she was tired, I knew she was and preferred not to have sex one single day.

You sound like a youtube red pill video.

 

[Deleted Account]

By knowing the girl as a person I feel more comfortable with her,

I understand if your sexually active and end up having sex regardless on most, but that's all up to you in the long run. The fact that you had a normal date is how a date's supposed to be. Just appreciate the date and move on forward this Woman, she'll know you respect her, not just in having a date to validate a sex drive act. Which what some men are seemingly after these days. I'm not sure if its just me, but I'll never understand this sex validation people need to have on dates, unless its just a case of natures course. I've had a few and they were just so, so...

 

[p1n1983]

She didn't told me she was tired, I knew she was and preferred not to have sex one single day.

I told you that you behaved like a typicall nice guy.
No matter if she is tired, she want's to feel his man streagth. You think that you are considerate avoiding sex, but you are showing weakness. A masculine man go for it, because he wants it, and is her job to say no if she is tired to do it. Trust me.. if she is really into you, no matter how much tired she is, she is going to be happy to jump your bones.

You sound like a youtube red pill video.

Maybe and you hate the red pill comunity because you figured out you are the typicall nice guy that need to change a lot to be succesfull with woman, and you can't accept that. The same way you can't accept that your girlfriend is not girlfriend material but you are still with her because you are afraid you can't get anything better.

 

[DefendMyHeart]

As a woman, I would appreciate it more if a man took the time to get to know me beyond any expectations of sexual relations. I would also appreciate a man more if he didn't have an expectation of sex everytime he saw me, especially if I had to work extra shifts and was extremely tired. I also find it odd, as a woman, how men seem to think the only way we can express our appreciation, love, feelings, or whatever toward our men is by having sex with them.
(Cue the "you don't know anything about women because you're a woman, and these books written by men for men about how women think and what they want are the absolute truth" responses)

 

[USER_ERROR]

As a woman, I would appreciate it more if a man took the time to get to know me beyond any expectations of sexual relations. I would also appreciate a man more if he didn't have an expectation of sex everytime he saw me, especially if I had to work extra shifts and was extremely tired. I also find it odd, as a woman, how men seem to think the only way we can express our appreciation, love, feelings, or whatever toward our men is by having sex with them.
(Cue the "you don't know anything about women because you're a woman, and these books written by men for men about how women think and what they want are the absolute truth" responses)