My loneliness

Hi people
I want to share my story with this community. I m 24 years old student and I have very good friends but most of them are males. I m not saying I havent any females friends yes I have many but problem is that we re not hanging out only if I meet them randomly.
I feel very derpessed about that. I d like to have someone close not neccesery gf.

I had one nice relationship 2 years ago since than I m single, couple times have sex experience but only for one night. It was nice but always end up with that, because they were from diffrent cities no way to see their regulary. Nowadays I m thinking only on sex I d really like to have with real person not only PMO it is so boring so I decide to abstain PMO btw today will be 7th day withoout any PMO.

I really feel lonely everyday I m suffering no matter what I do how I try I couldnt find any nice girl. I dont really know what I m doing wrong. I m kind of fun person I think but no one take me seriously. Maybe its because I m not attractive and I really look like 18 years old kid notice that I have 24.

last year in may I decide also abstain my record was 24 days approximately it was becasue on this day I was lucky I had sex but as I say it was only one night and than I return to the porn. I m curious if I can hold at least 30 days and than continue maybe its the right way and maybe this fucking shit porn is the real reason why I m lonely and depressed so I will see what happends. I know that change is not coming soon that is the for very very long long journey.

 

day 15 done... I m ok with no touching myself but I feel very horny. In these days I m staying at home I need to study for exams for whole week. Only places where I go is gym and home. I m literally alone even not type with any female at these days like I haven't any friends. Anyway conversation through FB sucks but the whole thing really sucks but what can I do... just believe it will be better and fight.