My Long term battle with (Masturbation& Porn) and Recovery

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by retrieval007, Sep 30, 2019.

  1. retrieval007

    retrieval007 New Fapstronaut

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    If you have failed many times in ending this Porn-Masturbation habit, then do read this story of mine and I hope you'll be all set to get rid of this addiction.
    To start with, I am 23 years old male and started watching porn and masturbation at an early age of 12. I would punctually masturbate 2 times a week. I tried countless times to stop this habit but failed miserably. After 4 years, when I was 16, I realized that my libido has decreased apparently, my bones became very week, I couldn't concentrate for prolonged duration while studying, I was a regular player in school's football team but due to consistent masturbation for such prolonged time, I had miserable stamina and had to dropout of school football team. Another important fact is the emission of few drops (sperms) while watching porn or having sexual fantasies.
    But these symptoms were just a beginning. One day I was urinating and just before finishing I saw milk-colored drops passing out after urine (known as spermatorrhoea). Also after urinating, some drops would still be left and they would pass out after few minutes. This is when I realized that enough is enough and I'm done with masturbation. I went cold turkey and never masturbated for next two years. Religion helped me and I totally cut myself off from Porn-masturbation. During this cold-turkey duration my health improved massively, gained confidence, started playing football and table tennis although my stamina was still not fit enough for playing in college football team.
    I would have morning woods almost every other night and I was glad I was back on my way to recovery. But these morning woods soon turned into nightmares. Actually my libido's foreskin, due to masturbation had become very sensitive to slightest touches and this was the whole reason I would ejaculate in sleep without having wet dream. This happened almost every night for 15-20 days and when I'd woke up, I felt really really tired. I'd feel acute pain in my shoulders accompanied with weakness in overall body.
    I searched for this on many forums and realized that these ejaculations accompanied with morning woods was making things worse for me and the only affordable solution was to drink water a lot during morning and to empty bladder, two hours before going to sleep and this proved to be an effective remedy. Then came university[I was 19 years old when I got admission] and I was doing good as far as recovery was concerned but damn these girls!!! Made a girlfriend during my 3rd year and here I was back on masturbating. But this time my masturbation wasn't on regular basis, whenever my girlfriend texted me erotic texts (sex-texting) I had no way other than to masturbate. Sometimes I'd masturbate 2 times a day, and sometimes 1 times a month, depending on girlfriend's mood :p To give a better understanding, I'd say I masturbated 20-25 times in a year.
    During this time, I had an awful amount of white hairs, my digestive system was not responding (Got Intestinal bowl syndrome), my bones were always cracking, and whenever I woke up I saw tiny spots on my pants showing my penis's struggle to unleash himself during whole night.
    After reading countless threads on this forum, I promised myself that I can beat this habit and it has been almost 100 days since my cold-turkey zone. (started in june this year)
    Apart from being in Cold-turkey zone, I am taking medications for spermatorrhoea. This disease is the basic reason for your health failure and ultimately for impotency as well. In order to spot these drops, try urinating for 10-15 days in a commode chair whose color is bit darker, because this color difference will help you identify milk-like drops ejaculating before or after urine. If you think you have got this disease, then it's better to get proper treatment, since this disease is curable, but if not treated it will destroy your life. Remember, this involuntary ejaculation basically means that you are releasing sperms on daily basis without having any sexual thoughts or even without masturbation and considering the energy stored in one sperm cell, having this issue is a real disaster, therefore it's better to get this treated. (Treatment involves taking pills which thicken the sperm fluid and stop it from ejaculating daily)

    And my brotherly advice to you is to never lose hope. Always believe in yourself. You'll do more damage to your health by losing hope. Whatever your symptoms are, if you are willing to beat this habit, then go all the way, don't look back and imagine only one picture; your future family. There'll be times when you'll think that there are no improvement signs, but my advice is to hang in there and be patient because "there's always darkness before the dawn".I promise you'll get positive results.
    I know a friend of mine who got blue balls due to excessive masturbation (he used to masturbate many times a day and I considered him a lost cause) but after going cold turkey for more than 3 years he has improved a lot.
    Best wishes to you, on this road to recovery :)
     
    Last edited: Sep 30, 2019
    SherlockHolmes fan and Luke777 like this.
  2. Kye

    Kye Fapstronaut

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    Inspiring Story Retrieval. Could I post daily progress here ? I'm starting a NoFap challenge this is my first time on this website. I'm not sure where I should post but i feel that it is probably a good commitment to be sharing how i feel everyday.

    Just a little introduction about me
    I'm Kye, 24 from Australia, born in Malaysia. I have been watching porn since when I was at a very young age and I would often be clouded with thoughts of sexuality when meeting girls. I feel that it has plagued my mind. about 2 years ago I applied for a 3 thousand dollars credit card, it has unfortunately been used majority for a webcam site and I have since been on this website on a regular basis. I want to stop, I've lasted for about a week before but the urge came back stronger than ever before. My problem is that going out to see girls dressed in tight yoga pants and shorts made this urge even stronger and I relapsed everytime during these ecounter.

    I've been trying and I will continue to try.
     

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