My NoFap diary (extreme case with Femdom/Findom)

Hey guys,

I started this journey mainly because of my depression and because of my unableness to have sex (ED). The last thing bothers me the most tbh, because I am 28 yo. already and even though I have been with some great girls, I could so far never in my life maintain a hard enough erection to really have sex with them. I never wanted to take V.pills, which maybe was a mistake, but well, now it's too late anyway.

I started at around 16 y. to watch P. and instead of beginning with normal sex P., I directly watched the extreme stuff (Femdom/Findom/Foot Fetish), which also scares me a bit, because normal sex has so far never really turned me on. I hope this will change by the end of this experiment. Also, I usually used to masturbate up to 5 hours daily (sometimes even longer), while watching Findom Twitter, Femdom videos or sex-roleplay-chats. The last months my "little friend" got not even really hard anymore, whenever I masturbated, which I guess kind of gave me the last wakeup call I needed. I have tried NoFap before a few years ago, but I did not take it very seriously and relapsed right after a maximum of 6 days.
I haven't set myself a day-limit, because I have no idea how long it will take me more or less to recover from this. I read guys who do this for up to 1 year, which I can't really imagine doing at this point. But I am willing to really do my best to beat this.

Day 2 without PMOing is coming to an end, even though my urges were pretty high during the day. I installed website-blockers on all potential websites, that I used to watch, which I feel really helped so far.
I will keep you guys updated. Also to hold myself accountable, if I want to relapse.

Thanks for reading, every comment/advise is appreciated. Cheers
 
Great decision you made. I'd say don't worry about having a long goal for now.
Just take it day by day and enjoy each moment that you don't have that trash in your life.
 
Hey guys,

I started this journey mainly because of my depression and because of my unableness to have sex (ED). The last thing bothers me the most tbh, because I am 28 yo. already and even though I have been with some great girls, I could so far never in my life maintain a hard enough erection to really have sex with them. I never wanted to take V.pills, which maybe was a mistake, but well, now it's too late anyway.

I started at around 16 y. to watch P. and instead of beginning with normal sex P., I directly watched the extreme stuff (Femdom/Findom/Foot Fetish), which also scares me a bit, because normal sex has so far never really turned me on. I hope this will change by the end of this experiment. Also, I usually used to masturbate up to 5 hours daily (sometimes even longer), while watching Findom Twitter, Femdom videos or sex-roleplay-chats. The last months my "little friend" got not even really hard anymore, whenever I masturbated, which I guess kind of gave me the last wakeup call I needed. I have tried NoFap before a few years ago, but I did not take it very seriously and relapsed right after a maximum of 6 days.
I haven't set myself a day-limit, because I have no idea how long it will take me more or less to recover from this. I read guys who do this for up to 1 year, which I can't really imagine doing at this point. But I am willing to really do my best to beat this.

Day 2 without PMOing is coming to an end, even though my urges were pretty high during the day. I installed website-blockers on all potential websites, that I used to watch, which I feel really helped so far.
I will keep you guys updated. Also to hold myself accountable, if I want to relapse.

Thanks for reading, every comment/advise is appreciated. Cheers
One day at a time, let's do whatever it takes to beat this
 
4 days of NoFap done guys! I think this is almost a record for me in many years. Yesterday I felt pretty depressed and today my urges have been on and off. Right now I don't feel horny at all, perhaps I am already on Flatline. But well, this makes it a lot easier for me tbh.
 
4 days of NoFap done guys! I think this is almost a record for me in many years. Yesterday I felt pretty depressed and today my urges have been on and off. Right now I don't feel horny at all, perhaps I am already on Flatline. But well, this makes it a lot easier for me tbh.

My relapse always happens during flatline. I am depressed too. But I know it is because I have more than 3 decades of PMO. I will have to take more than 300 days to recover. I have been having headache, rhinitis, blocked nose, stiff neck, and very low energy most of time for the last 30 days.

Most of the time, I think of my parents and my daughter (who she lives with my ex-wife). I cannot let myself down and I cannot disappoint them. I have to change. So, when my urge arises, I think of my very closed relatives and my daughter.

Keep yourself very busy. Do something! Running, cycling, swimming etc. Do not use mobile and computer unless it is 100% necessary.
Bear in mind you are still young, if you manage to get rid of it, you will still have many years to enjoy your life. I will be 50 in 4 month time.

Good luck! You will make it.
 
Best of luck dude! I've also struggled with femdom recently, although in my case it's probably a fetish I developed through excessive porn use, and not something I had from the beginning.
Either way I know how destructive it can get. Believe me when I say you'll feel like a different man after 10 days. When your mind doesn't have access to fetish P it pretty quickly goes back to a more natural view of sex - trust me.

I've 'relapsed' a few times during my brief flirt with nofap but it's taught me a very important lesson. THIS TAKES TIME. Don't expect to be cured overnight - you're probably going to fail, but each streak is going to make you stronger. Keep journaling, keep exercising and keep sticking to a routine and you'll forget about femdom in no time!
 
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