My odd addiction, I need some advice!

Bowder

Fapstronaut
Hey guys,

I need some advice. Right now I'm almost 6 days into rebooting and it's getting harder and harder every day.
I hoped I would gain energy from quitting porn but quiet the opposite is happening. It's taking so much energy to just abstain from relapsing I have nothing left for anything else. I still feel like I am wasting my days away, which ironically make the urges worse.

What can I do about this? Is this very common? And how long will it last?

On another topic, I have a question about my addiction. I never had a strong addiction to porn videos, though simple nude images I did watch a lot.
This wasn't my main addiction though. After leaving an abusive relationship followed by serious loneliness and immense stress, I got an interest in BSDM chatrooms.
I could spend hours scrolling through chatrooms, hoping to find someone with the same interests to have a very dom-sub orientated relationship.
The weird thing is, the second I found someone willing to go there, maybe even willing to send nudes, the addiction left me and I filled with regret. I would apologize and quit all chatrooms... only to crave another try the next day.

I treat this addiction the same as a normal porn addiction, however I would really like to know your opinions. Am I weird? Do more people struggle with this? How do I prevent myself from going back this path?(The urges are getting close to overwhelming)
 
Hey guys, I need some advice. Right now I'm almost 6 days into rebooting and it's getting harder and harder every day. I hoped I would gain energy from quitting porn but quiet the opposite is happening. It's taking so much energy to just abstain from relapsing I have nothing left for anything else. I still feel like I am wasting my days away, which ironically make the urges worse.

What can I do about this? Is this very common? And how long will it last?
What you are describing is very common for the early week or two doing the NoFap challenge. :oops: You might have an addiction lasting ten years, so expecting increased energy the first week is an unrealistic expectation. Let's say it takes a year to completely overcome this addiction for you. That is still a relatively quick time compared to the decade of abuse.
I am not saying it will take 12 months, but I would imagine it would take at least 6 months, so strap in for a bumpy ride.

Your fascination with BSDM chatrooms, is less common as you seem to suggest that you didn't actually watch BSDM porn. Nevertheless, it was an escalation from the nude pictures you used to enjoy. Often such escalations occur because we need something more taboo or extreme to get the same "fix" from the porn we are using. This is the Coolidge effect. Yet, when the chance actually comes (lol) to engage with someone, we feel dirty, ashamed and uncomfortable and back out. In this community, I would not say what you have described is weird.

Preventing relapses is the name of the game. The best advice I can give is to intercept and stamp on any sexual thoughts, urges and images straight away. Delay is dangerous and deadly. You know what triggers you - avoid it like the plague. Do not try and get a little "hit" by going close to something that gets your juices flowing and your heart beating. Have a range of things to do to distract you mind when you feel that your resolve is crumbling. Good luck buddy.

 
well, the first couple of attempts I´ve done were pretty much the same, like I wanted to focus doing some creative work but urges did annoy the crap out of me so I did relapse just to be able to keep working...but well relapse is exactly the thing not to do as well, right? ^^

I can tell what I´ve experienced and worked for me.
I did retry a couple of times, but since I´ve started doing breathing meditation, 15-20 minutes exactly after and another 15-20 minutes before sleep improved everything.
My longest streak was 16 days so it might sound crazy that I am currently doing day 8 but didn´t have a single urge...8 days no urges and I don´t even bother about PMO, when I see a picture that is actually definately a trigger by accident, I don´t start fahtasyzing, I just don´t mind and keep focusing about the important stuff.

Meditation is a rediculous underestimated trick the make NoFap way easier :D
 
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