Married/with partner for 30 years. Lovely daughter in her teens. User of PMO at various levels throughout my adult life. Wife does not like it and we have rowed in the past but if it is infrequent and discreet she's OK. Our sex life dropped to zero for more than 3 years in her pre-menopause and menopause. She told me she never wanted sex with me again and it was a very bad time for both of us. Though we never discussed it at the time, she must have known I was PMO at the time as an outlet for my urges. Happily came out of that period about one year ago now and our relationship is back on strong footing again. However, I have continued to PMO in addition to having sex with my wife. Currently on planned one-year break from work and so am at home all the time. This is a great opportunity for me to have time for the family and solo projects too. I have many interests and am writing my first novel, which is about 75% finished. Wife and daughter are both night owls, while I am a lark. In other words, I typically rise at 05:00 while they don't get up until 10:00. [My wife does not work and we home educate my daughter]. This gives me up to 5:00 hours of time to do as I please and be really productive. However, I have found myself wasting much of that time in viewing P and M to it. It would be a criminal waste not to make good use of my year off and that is what finally drove me to NOFAP and a resolution, yesterday, to kick my P M habit. Throughout our marriage, I have tended to want sex more frequently than my wife and that has caused tensions in the past. [Her feeling pressured/pestered/obligated]. After the 3 years of menopause, during which my wife wanted no sexual contact at all, we now have an arrangement which generally works well for us both. We sleep in separate rooms (practical given our different sleeping/waking cycles). If my wife is feeling horny, she will come to my room in the night, wake me up and we'll make love. She knows that I am nearly always in the mood, so I am unlikely to refuse. After thirty years together we know each other's bodies well and are good at bringing each other pleasure, so these encounters are usually satisfying for us both. My wife's libido is such that she usually 'visits' me about once every ten days. I tend to get horny after about three and that's when I have resorted to PM. Not knowing when my wife is going to 'require my services' means that I am reluctant to O while viewing P, to ensure that I am always ready to perform for her. This means that the PM has turned into prolonged edging sessions with no O at the end. This is why the sessions have tended to become longer and longer leaving me perpetually horny and at the same time regretting that I am wasting my precious free time. So my resolution is. Absolutely no more P. In order to achieve that, I think I will have to stick to no more M, as it is too easy to backslide from M to PM. O, therefore will only with my wife. I want to do this for me and for her. I don't want to burden her with the issue and want to be strong enough to do it alone, so that she will see the benefits but not feel obligated in any way. If I get tempted to relapse, then rather than M, I will try to distract myself with the many interest I have. I fear that even M without viewing P will be a slippery slope back to PM, so if I really struggle and crave sexual release, I will reluctantly ask my wife for help, rather than risk relapsing, and trust that we can work something out without raising the pressured/obligated problem. So here I am. Wish me luck on my journey. Any advice or messages of support from men or women would be very gratefully received.