My Woman

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Hotshot, Jul 15, 2014.

  1. Hotshot

    Hotshot Fapstronaut

    I feel a weight of obligation to tell my girlfriend of 4 years about this. I know I simply discovered the existance of my addiction last night [see my introduction ] but I really don't want to tell her. I don't know if I am looking to be talked into telling her, or talked out of it. 50/50 I guess right now.

    She knows I fap. I've openly talked to her about fapping. She asked about P though and I told her no. She's asked quite a few times... "what do you do when you fap?" and that's been more than once. She lives with me, and she does a lot of laundry. I always only wear black socks, so the white socks I get for christmas... you got it... fap socks. She knows this and since she does the majority [I haven't done laundry in 6 months] of the time, she knows I fap a lot. So I can understand her curiosity.

    She found an old P DVD I had from maybe 5-6 years ago that I just happened to have left in an old gym bag that I haven't used in years. [I got a new one] Naturally I declined ownership and said it was my buddies gym bag and he just never came back for it. She must know. I've never been caught. Yet as I stated before, there is plenty of evidence of the fapping which I have been open about.

    I believe she will think I have cheated on her. I think this is partially because of my anger toward myself, and that I feel like I cheated on her. Oddly enough, I never did think that until tonight. She said yes to getting married [eloping in a month] and I don't know if I should keep this from her. I love her and have every intention of getting married very soon. I just don't know what to do about it. I don't want her to look at me like I am a creep. Or like I cheated on her. But she is extremely supportive of me and would be a great anchor to have. Nobody would understand like she does, but I don't want to let her down. Maybe because of the pain I feel now for letting myself down. I don't want her to feel like that either.
  2. Geyser

    Geyser Fapstronaut

    I can not comment from experience, only from posts I have read, but I would tell her the full extent of your problem. There are accounts here of people getting divorced over this.

    She knows you fap and she's even inquired about it. Go ahead and get it out in the open. She will probably be as supportive as you hope.

    Best Of Luck,

  3. December

    December Fapstronaut

    This sounds like my situation when I found out about my bf's addiction. PLEASE tell her.
    I swear if she lives with you, she's going to find out anyway (I found out about my bf's p addiction around the time I moved in). If you continue to lie to her, it won't just be a porn addiction, you will have completely destroyed her trust in you. Trust me on this. Tell her about it, and let her know that you are taking steps to stop and that you need her support.
  4. The Thinker

    The Thinker Fapstronaut

    I agree with december. If you respect her, you should tell her and be as honest as possible. She will surely have a lot of questions, but the more of them you can answer honestly, the better she will come to understand your situation and then she can support you - I'm sure.

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