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NCAA Athlete’s Quest for Self Confidence

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by McCowboy99, May 18, 2020.

Can I control and not be controlled by my environment?

  1. Who thinks I can make it a full week?

    1 vote(s)
    100.0%
  2. Who thinks I can make it a month?

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  3. Who thinks I can land a starting spot on my team when I go back to school in August?

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. McCowboy99

    McCowboy99 Fapstronaut

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    I’m a collegiate men’s volleyball player who made it to where I am because I have a great work ethic. I can grind. I can go for hours doing drills and working out. I am passionate. However, something I have always lacked is self confidence which destroys me in the court. Something that always saved was was every now and then the hours I spent grinding could always help me pull out a win which eventually landed me a spot on my team. But, on the court I really can’t control my confidence which I directly relate to my problems with pornography and masturbation.
    Over the last two years I took an extended trip to Mexico where I passed very long amounts of time without problems but I didn’t really track it, and now that I am home in the same environment where the problem thrived before, the problem has returned which has brought me here. In Mexico I had confidence and I felt different. I want that again, but don’t want to go to Mexico to get it. I want it here, and wherever I go!
     
    | Nico |, Coffee Candy and palindromo like this.
  2. palindromo

    palindromo Fapstronaut

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    Welcome
    Please, start studying carefully what's happening in your mind > https://oceanrecoverycentre.com/2016/07/the-ultimate-guide-to-overcoming-internet-porn-addiction/

    First time without porn will be stressful , but if you resist , in some months you will feel reborn.

    If the first times a person relapse easly, it's okay.
    The streaks becomes even longer , day by day.
    Don't porn anymore, it's better to struggle and at the last to relapse than to look at porn.
    No more instagram pictures of models. No more erotic imagines , erotic stories or erotic asmr.
    If you experience ''flatline'' and low libido , resist.
    >https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/por...l-size-and-or-libido-are-decreasing-flatline/

    An effective weapon to overcome urges and thoughts : mindfulness.
    The brain will try to win you and to get some triggers for the seek of dopamine. Resist

    - - -
    Definitely don't go to Mexico to get confidence :emoji_sweat_smile:
    Have you ever studied body language? It's a good thing for confidence.

    Also trying to emprove in witch life area you are lacking.
    If someone is shy should try theater. If someone is fragile , should go to gym. If someone consider himself poor should get a job, and so on..
    However nofap will give you the energy you need. But first time are hard, resist man
     
    One Eyed Owl and | Nico | like this.
  3. xavierRodge

    xavierRodge Fapstronaut

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    Hey McCowboy99!

    Sounds like you're very hard on yourself. I've been there. Big time. The great work ethic you have is admirable and something to keep up - but the amateur psychologist in me (be forewarned to take everything i write here with a big grain of salt) tells me that you might be grinding and grinding to cover over a deeper seeded fear of failure. Even the phrase you use in that you desire to "control your confidence" is telling in a way, because I don't think TRYING to be confident and EXERTING is the way to get there. Instead, maybe you need to truly realise that failure doesn't really matter at the end of the day. One day you're going to be old and drinking soup and it's going to taste the same whether you win at volleyball or not. Enjoy the sport and enjoy the fact that you're good at it. Train hard but remember that you'll be okay if you lose.

    This might also explain why you could relax in Mexico- it gave you a different environment away from the site of your "grind" as there was no competition. No failure to avoid. No impulse to "grind". Personal anecdote warning: I suffer from reflux and food sensitivity, but when i was in Thailand last year for 3 weeks guess what? I was eating EVERTYTHING and had no problems. Funny that.

    Anyway, I have absolultely no training in psychology, just thought I'd share my thoughts. Will be following ya to see how you go on here McC99!
     
    | Nico | likes this.
  4. | Nico |

    | Nico | Distinguished Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    Welcome to the community mate :) glad you could join us, anything we can assist you with just let us know, hope you have a wonderful time here at nofap and all the best in achieving all your desired goals. Take care
     
    One Eyed Owl likes this.
  5. One Eyed Owl

    One Eyed Owl Distinguished Fapstronaut

    Welcome to NoFap!!!
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.

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