Nearly 19 - after years I have to stop

I

ianas

New Fapstronaut
Hi all,

I started watching/looking at porn when I accidentally stumbled across it at the age of 10 - I was looking for chess pawns but didn't know how to spell... After 6 years of escalation, I began to delve into Sissy Hypno - this coincided with a time where I was told I was going to move country when I was in love with a girl at school (and I really do mean love). After going through a series of rejections with other girls, I was ecstatic to find that this girl liked me back but then the news of me moving hit me like a train. I felt lonely and worthless - especially because I was a virgin and still am to this day while all my friends slowly but surely all got with people. I am now pretty much the only one. All this hasn't helped my self-confidence and has led me to delve even deeper into hypno that I struggle to get hard watching vanilla porn and have to turn to hypno or other sissy stuff to masturbate. However, once I finish I always feel guilty, angry and frustrated with my self because I know that I am not a sissy and that I am attracted to women. I'm not even 19 and I am seriously concerned that I have ruined my sex life. I'm even talking to a girl that I really like and she's like a 9 and everything is great with her but when I get horny I just can't get off on normal porn.

I'm trying to quit porn for a year as many other people have suggested on other links. Here is to Day 1!
 
Hello and welcome! :)

We are glad to have you as a part of our community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

Getting Started Guide | How to Use the NoFap Forums | Panic Button | Day Counter | Rebooting Resources | Forum Rules | Glossary

If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

You can also take part in one of the many challenges available. It can be a tremendous help. Challenges

Also, there are groups you can also join if you wish to do so. You can browse through them here. Groups

There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here to help you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothing but the best!
 
Honestly, it will get better and you will restore your sex life, but only if you kick porn and masturbation! You have plenty of time and being young you'll recover quickly. Mentally it takes longer, but physically by 20-30 days you'll be a lot better. Mentally may take longer, but if you keep yourself occupied then slowly these thoughts begin to become less common.
 
SparkySub said:
Honestly, it will get better and you will restore your sex life, but only if you kick porn and masturbation! You have plenty of time and being young you'll recover quickly. Mentally it takes longer, but physically by 20-30 days you'll be a lot better. Mentally may take longer, but if you keep yourself occupied then slowly these thoughts begin to become less common.
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Honestly, it has been a few days now where I haven't watched any porn or even those pesky instagram babes and I am feeling a lot better about it (but this has happened before and I then went back to it even harder than before). I guess I just need to get through that stage where it gets more difficult. Posting on here is definitely helping because every time I feel a bit horny I go on here instead and it helps me to resist. Also there isn't much to restore :). Do you think hitting the gym will help by the way? Maybe if I get bigger it'll help me to fit what I think a man should be like and prove to myself that I am one - it also goes completely against the whole hypno narrative of being weak.
 
ianas said:
I try :)
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You should act in the first 10-15 seconds . ... If you accidentally watch something which leads you to relapse , immediately stop it, else it will be over you and you will lose... I literally have ditched falling prey of masturbation 2 times today. Just come to this forum, if you are bored and get a itch to watch that stuff
 
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