Need advise

Hi,
I am new on this. English is not my native language so please be comprehensive with my english.
I am 28 years old, i have been doing PMO since i was 13 old i belive and did it on a regular basis of 1/day almost in my life. Sometimes after sex i felt the need of doing PMO, even if i didnt have more energies to give....

Now i started a
- 90 days of no P and M.
- Perhaps after 30 days, one Orgams inducted by sex will be allowed.

And i have the nexts questions:
Its my day 12 and i have a lots of feelings i dont know why they are here...
First of all, i have a lot of fears and anguish (distress?), i believe its a response of the body trying to take me back to the addiction i had. Does anyone felt something this similar? Its a very strong feeling and it attacks at any moment of the day. My brain attacks me with lots of regrets from the past like never did before and i dont know if it is some "process" that normally occurs during this kind of "treatment".

Also i was an active person, but now i just want to get back home and start this "Brain fear regrets process", does anyone felt something like this?

I believe i am reaching the top of a rollercoaster and i have to hold my breath until i reach the top of it.

Good luck and thanks to all!