Need help urgently

M

marckma

New Fapstronaut
Hello, I discovered this forum some time ago but finally I had the courage to write my first post, also somehow because of my despair.
Well my name is Marcos and I’m 24 years old and I’ve been a pornography addict for the last 10 years.
It all started with normal model’s lingerie photos, however, over time, this innocent masturbation stimulus increased. Firstly, with mainstream porno videos and finally with more fanciful videos full of fetishes such as foot fetishes, femdom and blackmail videos. Despite the fact of finishing my master’s degree with success, I think that this addiction can hinder my performance in my new job, since I loose a lot of time until find the “perfect video”. I’m also afraid that someday I might use “stronger” stimulus and weirder fetishes to masturbate. Also, in terms of sexual life, I can say that this affected drastically my experiences since I try to export all of this to real life. I just want have sex with anything that moves, and when it's not possible to have someone to have sex, I just go to prostitutes. I know the root of all this is porn and I’ve tried to stop it many times. Block porn videos on my phone, work out, take cold water showers, delete my instagram, but after 1 week without watching them, I always end up relapsing. I really want to stop with this. I think that only willpower is not enough. I'm able to kind of control the external stimuli, however when it comes to internal stimuli I think that it's harder to control.
What can I do? What strategies should I follow? Thanks in advance.


PS: I'm a portuguese native speaker, so sorry if my English is not perfect
 
Last edited:
modern milarepa said:
Try some sex transmutation techniques like tantric sex or dantien meditation

I explain it here
https://forum.nofap.com/index.php?threads/11-months-no-pmo-semen-retention-cracking-the-code.306335/
Click to expand...

Thank you so much for your answer. I'll see that for sure. I know that the first step of solving a problem is always know that the problem exists and talk about it with other people. This way I know that I'm not alone in this journey of stop watching porn. I know that it will be hard but I'll try to participate more in this forum by talking about my experience and by reading about other's experience.
 
For me, some things that work are:

- meditation & mindfulness (seriously - even just for ten minutes or so at the start of the day seriously helps to ground me!)

- Substitution - substitute watching porn with another activity, one that brings you joy. Do you play an instrument? Do you like to exercise? When you feel the porn urge coming on, go to a different place in the house (or wherever you are). Even just a small thing like that can jolt you out of it (at least it works for me).

Therapy - this has been the biggest one for me. You want to control the 'internal stimuli'? Well, you need to understand them first! Going to therapy is a great way to get to know yourself and the way your mind works. As you begin to excavate your own mind, you begin to learn why you might have been susceptible to porn addiction in the first place! This is very empowering knowledge to have.

- Lube! - I have found that if I set aside some dedicated time for masturbation (without porn) in the evening, it leaves me feeling better about myself and it trains my mind not to need porn to get aroused. WhenI first tried this, it didn't really work, as I just couldn't get aroused without watching porn. So I went out and bought some lube, and that has helped massively! No Joke :)
 
Hi and welcome!
I want to add: Stay and get im touch with the NoFap community. You become like the people you surround yourself with. And the more you spend time here, the more the thought 'porn is bad' manifests in your brain.
 
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