Need help

What led you to return back to it after 97 days?

 

Hey Timeforachange90. Sorry to hear it but you are not a bad person. You are a good person who just has an illness (addiction) that cropped back up.

I usually relapsed when I negected to get my treatment for my addiction which is things like addressing my addiction. Reading this forum, meetings, getting help, etc. My addiction never went away. It would crop back up just like your situation, leaving me dumbfounded.

Don't beat yourself up for losing the money. You have the credit but it doesn't mean you have to use it. Look at it as a donation. You donated to some people's livelihood so they can eventually pay for the therapy they will need to heal from sex addiction too. It's not wasted. And you got a learning experience out of it.

Coming clean to your wife might be tough. But you don't need to spill it all to her until you're ready. Tell people in the NoFap program and that will help you get past it. If you're afraid she will be mad then wait until you got some clean time under your belt again. Then you can say look I had a slip 15 30 whatever days ago but I got back on the horse and I'm sorry. What you really need is your own forgiveness not your wife's or mine or anyone else's.

If you are stuck in a relapse, that is common after a long streak. If I picked up after a long streak I would be stuck in a relapse because its like my addiction takes my brain back over. Eventually you will be set free from the relapse again, and have another chance. It will come sooner or later.

Hope this helped. Try to forgive yourself. Stick around the forums a little (if you want to) and get some support.