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Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by innermostheart, Jan 31, 2019.
So I guess I would hang out in this site when tempted instead of going in to sites of hell...
why do you want to quit?
To have a better life..
starting to post here is a great first step toward a better life. congrats on thaet
what specific things will improve in your life when you quit porn.
Maybe would remove my depression and suicidal thoughts first of all..
Then i could feel much better... happier...
And maybe i could not give myself into woman that much
Maybe i would have control of myself
firstly, regarding suicidal thoughts I am no way qualified to discuss that and you should talk to close friend/family/therapist right away. Somtimes porn causes the depression, sometimes the depressions leads you to porn. IT's VERY IMPORTANT to know which way it is for you.
Quitting porn is something I can talk about as I am in beginning process of that and haven't looked at porn for the past week or so by following some simple steps.
Id be happy to give you the first few steps that worked for me, but you need to do this all on your own. I can only guide and support.
Three step process (only talking about #1 and #2 here). I think you will find these pretty easy to do. Goal is to change your relationship with the urges/cravings. Just fighting them and trying suppress them makes matters worse by creating MORE stress and anxiety. To most when the urge starts, through their "inner voice" they start having a conversation in their head that scripts something like this
Does that script sound familiar? you just cant stop thinking about. this is actually two parts of your brain having a fight. thus the anxiety. The key is that most just listen to these inner voices as if they are watching a movie,and just let them flow, creating more stress/anxiety. This is a bad movie. You dont want to just sit there an watch it.
This can be changed. Two steps
Step #1: Quick education on what is happening at biochem level in your brain
Step# 2: Use the technique which I will outline when you finish step 1. But basics are you, don't try run from the urge (you can't). Embrace it. Own it Dont let inner voice control the conversation, YOU take control.
watch first video once and the second one three times ( then watch the second one each morning until you have it memorized. They are each only 5 minutes long. All of this info in these videos is presented in a variety of ways in a variety of videos/papers etc. Ive find these two quickly cut to the important stuff and are easy to understand
Once you did above let me know what you thought about them.
The Urges are Not Bad
You are not the Urge
You are not Bad