Need some serious advice.

How do you know "porn" caused her emotional pain? Did she say this? Or are you telling this to yourself? We need more background on what actually took place.

 

If porn was the root of why she left , you need to fix you first and foremost. Only when you're clean for more than a few measly months should you even think about pursuing her.

 

Terrible advice!!! If she's gone she's gone, you can't waste time pursuing somebody that no longer values you and is on the market looking for somebody else. You gotta move on.

 

Please.....I'm the SO of a PA. Bc someone leaves doesn't mean they don't care or love you it means they have had enough of your bullshit. By bullshit I mean porn. If I left and my PA changed his shitty nasty ways and put porn in the past I'd try again . But it certainly would not be an overnight oh gee you haven't jerked off in a month blasé attitude either.

 

As an aside how exactly does the porn addict show he values his partner choking his chicken to a bunch of degenerate videos then proceeding to tell lie after lie to keep his dirty little secret. No, I'm sorry a porn addict is the last person who should be flapping their gums about values.

 

My point is that if his gf has been broken up with him for months, she will surely be on the market, going on dates, falling for other guys. OP certainly needs to work on himself, but it is unhealthy to put his ex on a pedestal, when it is way more likely than not that she will move on. He should seek professional help and attempt real self improvement, and channel the energy towards finding a new sexual partner and learning from past mistakes.

 

Having an ex move on is very painful, but it is inevitable, and the pain is only amplified if you are still mentally stuck in the relationship.

 

Well if she's run off and is looking vehemently then you're probably right, but if she's not she's probably wondering how the fuck he got into all of that and not finding answers or closure. Fwiw, I moved on from a guy I still cared about , dated/slept with a few but I still always wished for what could have been.....not so much any more but at the time most definitely.

 

I don't think you understand how damaging it can be for a man to waste "months" of his life stressing over the activities an ex is getting into, and thinking hell get her back. OP I am begging you, for the sake of your sanity, do not focus your efforts on winning an ex girlfriend back.

 

I suggest to move on and focus on yourself for the time being. If you truly love her then you would want the best for her whether she is with you or not, right? So take this time to focus on yourself a rid porn from your life. Once you do that then it's up to you if you want to get her back or not. If it doesn't work out then still move on. Don't dwell on this too long or it'll just negatively affect you. Good luck dude.

 

From what you posted, I'm going to say no, you don't stand a chance if you rid the "evil". But don't let some stranger tell you what's going to work for you and your life. I truly hope everything works out for the both of you.

 

She deserves someone completely freed from this awful addiction. You can ask her to wait for you because you're going to beat this or ask her to help you to beat it. But I wouldn't be surprised if she says it's not worth the pain you've put her through. Even if she isn't in the picture, destroy this thing, for your own progress and well being. Good luck! You can do this.

 

Well first of all you need to fight your addiction because if you don't no matter what you do the result will be the same.That means you need a plan to fix things.Now after you have done these things and you are fighting the addiction (and i mean a really tough fight because it ruined your life as you said) talk to her and explain that you are making an effort to change and if she cares for you then she will stay by your side and help you.On the other hand if she has moved on and she doesn't want to deal with you anymore then move on because it is a waste of your time.

Try to make a change because it all started with you.Don't listen to anyone here but listen to your heart.Before you take any action though make sure you are ready and willing to change because if she agrees to stick by your side you will only have one shot.No second chances afterwards so you better be sure that you have a plan that is working to stop the addiction and also that you are doing what you feel is right

 

I am not saying fix it completely but have a plan that is working and is keeping the addiction back. Then talk to her and she will understand hopefully if not then bye bye time to move on

 

Maybe you dont focus on winning her back, but focus first on fixing your porn addiction problems. If you already fixed that, show her that you did, and you did that for her because you realized your mistake and maybe she'll give you a second chance