need to change direction, cant do it

Hi. Relapsed again, i feel like i dont have control over myself. Its depressing.

Ive been struggling for years, trying to make peace with myself. I havent been here before, talking with people, but i did tried rebooting before, many times. Most tries lasted a week, usually until sunday when i felt bored and gave in. Most i managed was around 30 days no PMO and then porn started seeping in, though i managed 80 days no MO that time. That was nasty 50 days of in between...

Recently alot of shit was happening in my life and i think the energy i have during rebooting would help me get a grip on my life, and hopefully improve it in long term.

Im a pretty closed up person usually, but things are forcing me out of my shell in hope of improvement. I have questions, and id like to hear about other peoples experiences. Im interested in how noFap fits in the big picture, life, society, culture. Is it right? Do i have that problem or some other one? How to live with it if i have that problem?

Uhm, ill browse through the forum a bit for a start... Thanks for reading.

 

Well, getting regular sleep is good, being rested gives me a fighting chance. I want to think about good things in my future that NoFap might bring. I dunno... I am at zero right now and id been so for a long time. I can think of strategies but putting them to action is another story.