New female fapstronaut

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by myownlanguage, Mar 15, 2017.

  1. myownlanguage

    myownlanguage Fapstronaut

    Hello fellow fapstronauts! I don't know why this isn't more common among women. Wish I didn't have to feel so alone :( After all, I think women can have these problems just as well as men.. So, I'd like to share my story with you.

    I think I started watching porn when I was around 12 years old. Might even have been earlier. It started with innocent stuff that I soon got bored of and it got more hardcore every time. Then when I was 19 I had my first boyfriend that I didn't have great sex with. I always preferred watching porn. I was never really ashamed of watching porn, thought I was one of the 'cool girls' that also watch porn and understand when a guy does.

    So when I got out of this relationship, almost a year ago (I'm 24 now) I started looking for male attention and better sex, because I thought it was just that me and my ex weren't compatible. Sometimes I really enjoyed random sex, but I noticed that most of the time I just wasn't really wet. I grew more and more self-conscious about this. The thing is that I do get really wet when I watch porn, just not with 'real' men. It was frustrating and whenever I'd go out with a date I was anxious and worrying that I wouldn't get wet enough. Obviously, that doesn't help much.

    So a few days ago I got drunk with a date and he said that I never got really wet when I had sex with him. That hurt. Even though I knew he was right. I was so embarrassed, self-conscious and I felt like shit. When I got home I cried and felt like I wasn't a real woman, and I was (/am) jealous of all the normal women who get wet so easily. I can't go on like this, I want to 'reset' myself, stop watching porn and enjoy having real sex without having to worry about whether my body will function properly.

    So yeah, I hope NoFap will help me get back to being normal. Thanks for reading ;)
  2. MrGiantAnt

    MrGiantAnt Fapstronaut

    Sister, you are among people who wants to get better. This site is for any gender, we will try our best to make you feel welcome. Don't feel bad, I relaspe on pmo after 28 hrs. Most people have this problem but not brave enough to acknowledge it. I can understand not being pleased with a partner. It would take me about a hour before I orgasm. Porn messes with our natural sexuality and deprives us of human partners. You came to the right poo place sister.
    D . J . and myownlanguage like this.
  3. Sojourner7777

    Sojourner7777 Fapstronaut

    Welcome Tessa, glad you made the decision to join. Big step forward!

    D . J . and myownlanguage like this.
  4. myownlanguage

    myownlanguage Fapstronaut

    Thank you so much for your kind replies. It's a relief to read I'm not alone :)
    Sojourner7777, D . J . and MrGiantAnt like this.
  5. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Thank you so much for sharing your story. As you can guess, mostly men post to NoFap and we don't often get a chance to her in what physical, emotional and psychological ways porn affects women.

    You are no alone. Please
    check out In Case You Didn't Know for strategies and tips to help you along your journey. Within the strategies and tips are links to ares on the site where women share with each other the pain you are experiencing.
  6. i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

    Welcome to the forum. You are not alone... I read a recent study that said that out of all porn addicts 80% are male and 20% are female. I think women fear being harassed in a public forum and with good reason because it's been known to happen. Check out the 'Women' folder and start a journal. You can also go the the 'Accountability Partner's folder to pair up with someone. I hope you find the resources you need to succeed.
    vxlccm and D . J . like this.
  7. vxlccm

    vxlccm Fapstronaut

    My Journal
    There's always a concern that it's triggering to discuss these kinds of topics. That's the only concern anyone would have. Glad you are here and trying and willing to talk. Definitely not a guys club. If anything, we know what it can do and always hate to hear about one more innocent damaged by the tide of evil. Real efforts and getting back up and trying again and again are what can help you. Many people here are significantly older, so I can't be alone in hoping you're able to conquer this and live out a perfectly fulfilling life. Hang in there!
  8. Star Lord

    Star Lord Fapstronaut

    It could just be that any sexual partners you've had up to now just don't know how to hit you're sweet spot?

    Maybe they aren't very imaginative and don't improvise with anything else.

    If you catch my drift.

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