New Here - Trying hardmode for awhile

Hey guys, I've struggled with masturbation addiction since puberty, doing it daily in my younger days or even more then, even before I ever began looking at porn. In my late teens someone told me that people use porn to get off, which I was naive and thought people just looked at porn cause they were attracted to naked women's bodies but not touching themselves too. Anyways, after someone told me that I began PMO routines when I was alone and horny instead of just masturbation with my thoughts. I wasn't using porn everyday or anything at that time though and also sometimes used photos in magazines of clothed women or swimwear while masturbating.

My porn addiction really began in a bad way in my mid twenties following a particularly difficult break up with a girlfriend that caused a lot of sadness for me and I was coping with PMO, even though I knew it was wrong and was making my sadness and loneliness even worse. That is when I began doing over hour long porn sessions and edging the whole time almost nightly causing many mental problems during that time.

The past three years I began self-improvement and focusing on that in all areas of my life and was able to wean myself off the porn and pmo considerably from every night to maybe only a few times a week then a few times a month, but I know it was always come back to everyday again if not careful. This year since January 1st, I've been porn free, both purposefully searching for porn and touching myself if I saw any accidentally on social media and looking at it more than a few seconds.

But although I have been porn free, I haven't been masturbation free because I would still do that using my thoughts or occasionally with photos of fully clothed women on the internet I would find having particularly attractive features, and certain times through the year it was up to every other day at the worst of masturbation. I have also started looking at pictures of clothed women sexually for long times, which I'm working on stopping. I have been working on weaning myself off masturbation completely and the past two months have gotten down to masturbating around 3-4 times a month.

Recently I experienced a breakup with a girlfriend, and I don't want to go into another PMO cycle ever again and am trying to quit masturbation completely as a personal self-improvement goal. I'm deciding to try hardmode because I'm not currently looking for another girlfriend yet, and also I try to only date women now who are religious and wanting to wait for marriage, because I'm only dating for the purpose of finding a wife now. If the right women came along though of course, I may end up abandoning hardmode and just trying to stay porn and masturbation free, cause that is the most important for my personal self-improvement and mental health.

I'm here for accountability and comradery.