New lady needs help

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by badteresa, May 2, 2019.

  1. badteresa

    badteresa Fapstronaut

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    Hi
    I am new here
    I’m married and a sex addict
    I have just started saa without telling my husband. It was recommended that I get a support partner and this site.
    He knows I have a wild past but does not know it didn’t stop when we got married
    We have been married 5 years have a lovely son and I have cheated on him many times
     
    Solomon435 likes this.
  2. Bombadil

    Bombadil Fapstronaut

    Welcome! I think you'll find there are quite a few stories like that floating around here. You've taken a good step in the right direction coming to NoFap. I won't patronise you and pretend it's all unicorns and rainbows, it sounds like you have a hard road to follow. First step would be to start a journal, so you can see progress, and what sort of things are triggering your addiction. Also there is a lot of stuff here you might find helpful, so have a poke about (though do be aware that we have more than our fair share of juvenile idiots as well).

    Hope you manage to defeat this.
     
  3. badteresa

    badteresa Fapstronaut

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    Thanks I appreciate the warning about juvenile idiots
     
  4. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

  5. badteresa

    badteresa Fapstronaut

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    At this point I am not involving him. He does not know my indiscretions.
    I know that is another secret to keep but I am not yet willing to open to him
     
  6. Bombadil

    Bombadil Fapstronaut

    Heh. Let's just say there are some 'interesting' solutions doing the rounds. :)
     
  7. You may find many users here will encourage you to come clean and stop hiding things from your husband. There's no single right or wrong way to get yourself better, but total honesty and transparency usually helps the recovery process even though it can be devastating.
     
  8. badteresa

    badteresa Fapstronaut

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    Oh I totally believe that honesty is the best. But I believe it would kill him if he knew
    When i get stronger with this struggle and have some time behind me i know i have to come clean
     
  9. jianpip

    jianpip Fapstronaut

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    I think honesty would only make YOU feel good, but it would totally destroy him. Sometimes the best you can do is showing that you Love him by stopping, your cross to carry would be your secret. In many saa meetings I have been they encourage to keep it to yourself because going out with that bomb too early can cause more problems that it can solve. I would say though that being open helps, so if you can share in saa meetings what you cannot tell him, that would help you a lot. In the end the only forgiveness that matter is the one that we get from GOD. And He totally Loves YOU, no matter how bad you think you are. Keep going!
     
    badteresa, Bombadil and need4realchg like this.

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