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New member (Married male, 48, long time user/abuser of porn)

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by MaxP71, Apr 24, 2019.

  1. Apr 24, 2019 #1
    MaxP71

    MaxP71 Fapstronaut

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    Hello all,

    As the subject says, I'm a new member here. I'm 48 years old and have been married for a little over 10 years. I've been masturbating regularly for over 30 years. Over that time, my usage of porn to urge on that masturbation has grown steadily, with the porn getting more... intense over time. I've sort of made some half-hearted attempts to control it / rein it in in the past, but never took it too seriously. Things kind of blew up a month ago and suffice it to say I am now committed to making changes. Specifically, I want to completely quit porn. Full stop. I also want to get the masturbation under control. My therapist suggested a 90-day stoppage. That's a pretty daunting number; I'm sure I haven't gone that long in well over 30 years, so right now my goal is 30 days, and if I can do that, I'll see if I can do another 30. I've learned a lot about porn addiction in the last few weeks, and am looking forward to learning a lot more here!
     
    MaxP71, Apr 24, 2019
    MaxP71, Apr 24, 2019
    #1
    Deleted Account and Foton like this.
  2. Apr 24, 2019 #2
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Welcome to the community. Read, learn and start making your plan.
    You can do this.
     
    Deleted Account, Apr 24, 2019
    Deleted Account, Apr 24, 2019
    #2
  3. Apr 24, 2019 #3
    TryingHard2Change

    TryingHard2Change Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Start a journal .. write in it often.

    Read, read, read -- there are lots of good forums / everyone here is similarly-minded .. trying to stop PM'ing. The Rebooting in a Relationship forum is a great place to read the stories from both the PA's and SO's --- hearing the plight of the SO's has helped me understand my hurting wife.

    Welcome..you can do this. It is NOT going to be easy. Educate yourself .. watch/listen to all the podcasts, YouTube videos, etc. about porn and recovery from PA. Find an accountability partner..online and/or in person. When you cross that boundary of talking to people in real life about PA -- then you've really embraced recovery. If you feel far from that place .. don't worry - that is fine.

    Keep coming back. There is SSSOO much to learn here on NoFap. You are among friends.
     
    TryingHard2Change, Apr 24, 2019
    TryingHard2Change, Apr 24, 2019
    #3
    billyballer and Deleted Account like this.
  4. Apr 25, 2019 #4
    MaxP71

    MaxP71 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the encouragement! I plan to start a journal soon.
     
    MaxP71, Apr 25, 2019
    MaxP71, Apr 25, 2019
    #4
  5. Apr 25, 2019 #5
    Pashka

    Pashka Fapstronaut

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    Similar story here. I am 54 and married. Joining this site recently has given me a lot of hope. Here's to a better life.
     
    Pashka, Apr 25, 2019
    Pashka, Apr 25, 2019
    #5
    Committed to One and MaxP71 like this.
  6. Jun 4, 2020 #6
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Deleted Account, Jun 4, 2020
    Deleted Account, Jun 4, 2020
    #6
    TryingHard2Change likes this.
  7. Jun 5, 2020 #7
    TryingHard2Change

    TryingHard2Change Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the invite. It looks very interesting... I'm glad people are doing Innovative things to help one another increase motivation. I'm in.
     
    TryingHard2Change, Jun 5, 2020
    TryingHard2Change, Jun 5, 2020
    #7
    Deleted Account likes this.
  8. Jun 5, 2020 #8
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Oh that's great @TryingHard2Change, I've added you to the Hall of Fame, you are currently ranked as Twins. Congratulations. Good luck on your journey, feel free to post in the challenge to let us know how it's going or just to encourage others. Whatever you do, do whats best for your recovery. See you around!
     
    Deleted Account, Jun 5, 2020
    Deleted Account, Jun 5, 2020
    #8

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