So I relapsed again... Nothing new in this process, but the difference this time was that I didn't do it because I had an urge. I did it because my head was so foggy and heavy that it brought back the familiar feeling of lonliness due to said feeling and the PMO habit stems from this. I've always felt stupid and useless (even though its not true) and PMO was always my way of feeling like I had succeeded sexually and socially like everyone else around me seems to succeed. It's all a fabrication in my mind, I know, and it's good that I'm finally getting in touch with this. The question that seems to keep arising for me is, is there something legitimately wrong with me or did PMO destroy my mental abilities? I remember feeling stupid and useless way before I started my PMO habit. I can't tell which came first and that distresses me a lot. I don't know why I'm posting this, I just felt like it. I always enjoy responses. Good luck everyone.