New to NoFap, but I need it A LOT.

Hi guys, I wanted to share a bit of what I'm going through with you.
I absolutely couldn't sleep tonight, it was insane, it was the only day I'd decided to see how it would go without the medication for OCD and it was just a terrible decision, the unwanted thoughts kept coming and I kept Fighting them, Feeling like one time or another I'd give in and quit both the NoFap and my main objective of ending this crap, and trust me I tried my best and although it was enough to keep me from relapsing, it wasn't enough to get me to sleep. I've been on medication for OCD and from what I've researched, it's not one of those that are known for reducing sexual desire so I don't feel like I'm on a fake reboot (15 days now).
I was on insane HOCD, I just couldn't, absolutely couldn't Sleep some days, was Feeling horrible About myself, had already switched my Tinder to Show both guys and Girls and reswitched it 2 times and couldn't stop thinking About all the Girls I'd fell for my entire life only for porn to turn me gay out of a sudden as a Teenager. I've had this for like 7 years (I'm 21 now, started masturbating at 13), and I miss being a kid or at the beggining of porn when all I would think of was hot women and would get super aroused by them. I learned to deal with this for some years where I would fantasize about men and women but through time the fantasies about men just started getting stronger, I started getting a lot more aroused by them and I could swear one time or another my freaking brain would make me 100% gay where I'd lead an unhappy life with another guy who I'd just be Friends with because of my brain's Need for dopamine, that's when the HOCD got SO MUCH WORSE, and I got depressed and started not being able to sleep anymore.
Thing is I love gay guys, they've been my best friends my whole life because as a kid I was bullied, suffered severe OCD and anxiety, was psychological abuse and I think they are People that understand these things pretty well just like me, and they're always super nice. When I switched my Tinder, I tried to like the guys, but it just didn't work, some of them were interesting and really nice but I couldn't hep but feel absolutely weird thinking of all we were gonna have to do. I absolutely love women and I swear that if this NoFap doesn't get this extinguished from my life I won't be able to feel happy.
These 15 days have been amazing, even got these unwanted fantasies but they were way less frequent and I'd get more about women. I didn't go searching for it but everytime my friend would send nudity on wapp I'd look at it for Brief 3 to 5 seconds and move on so that my Reboot wouldn't be damaged and it was enough to make me feel aroused everytime to women and not to men. I'm gonna try 3 months and if possible even more, like 6 or so, or maybe I'll even quit Masturbation completely after this. T

oday was quite shitty but I think it was good to Show me that what I'm experiencing isn't normal at all and that the medication is gonna be necessary and it won't make my NoFap any less valid.​

I'm Posting this now because I absolutely love the NoFap community, you guys are amazing and I'd never felt so good in my life as in these days where I was so much more sure of who I was, and felt as if I could do and be anything that I wanted. The day I flirted the best with a girl that I liked was a day in which I had been in NoFap for a while, like 4 days or so, and was also masturbating less frequently, I want that to be permanent and everytime. I sing too sometimes and play guitar (4 hours a day) and I even saw improvements to my voice! These were amazing days and only because of you guys, I love you a lot for showing me all this was possible. That's basically all I wanted to say, if I could meet some of you that would be nice too. After all this started I felt so lonely and so horrible, I felt as if no one would ever understand me, but now that I've found the HOCD and the NoFap community it's been an amazing relief and I've finally started seeing some type of result that I didn't even know were possible to get.