New to NoFap, not new to trying to Improve

Hey! I'm new to this site and am hopeful for what is to come.

For a while (roughly 2 years) I've tried using another other program called FORTIFY to track and work on reducing my pornography use (but have stopped now that it's not free because I'm 18). I first discovered porn 5 years ago when I was around 12 or 13 and what is distinctly interesting for me is that I remember vividly that I began puberty (exploring myself, wondering what the heck is going on with my nether regions) shortly before encountering P by googling sex. When I think back to how compulsive and in-awe of it all back then, and how even being horrifically caught by my dad did not stop me for more than a month, I just cringe and feel even more ashamed that this has stayed with me into college. I'm fairly sure according to my fortify counter, my longest streak ever was during July, 2 years ago, for 30 days. My most recent streak was 5 days without 1.5 weeks ago. I just read the glossary of terms here and I totally agree with the surge thing! I was feeling really great on day 5 but... you can guess the rest. I've had terrible trouble with self-control and can totally relate to feeling that it's compulsive, and I can physically feel myself becoming hyper-stimulated and begin to rationalize my behavior.

This site seems very developed though, and I'm hopeful that maybe it can catalyze some action for me, to start abstaining from PM, which I know is harmful for my brain, my views of other people (especially females whom I would love to see only as friends), my wasted free/productive time, and my girlfriend who is incredibly offended by this leading to lying and even more shame.

I'd be interested in an accountability partner for checking in daily (casually, not for phone calls or anything) because I want to be able to talk to someone with 0 investment in me (I can't talk to my girlfriend straight because she is so offended by it).

Anyways, I hope this works out! Current goal is 3 days; then hopefully a week; with the overall goal of improving upon my % of days in a month, with February's % being 56% of days clean. Aiming for at least 70% this month, meaning 21 days or more clean.

I hope you all grow and succede in your journeys, and that I find the strength to do so as well!

 

Discord seems to be a potentially usefull medium. There's a chat I joined called Reboot warriors (found the link on another NoFap forum post). Not sure how to invite peeps though. Maybe just look for the link in the "Looking for Accountability Partner" forum thread. That's where I found it.