New to NoFap

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by river tree star, Aug 13, 2019.

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  1. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Hi, I just signed up to the NoFap site. I'm still exploring to find out exactly what the site has to offer. I somehow slowly grew tired of daily masturbating to porn, but find it almost impossible to quit. It's like a drug. It seems hard to find clear reasons why there is anything wrong with it, since I don't suffer any obvious negatives yet in my life as a result of this habit--except that it just doesn't feel good to have this addiction. So I keep having the wish to stop the habit, or at least greatly diminish it, and am hoping to find some ideas or support on how to approach it. A few years ago I visited a couple of Sexaholics Anonymous meetings. It was an honest and good group of people, but most people in that group were evangelicals who had a certain attitude towards sexuality in general that I did not feel comfortable with. So I'm hoping to find some support here on the NoFap site. Starting with this post, and see where it goes.
     
  2. Hello and welcome! :)

    We are glad to have you as a part of our community. Here are some quick links to get you started.

    Getting Started Guide | How to Use the NoFap Forums | Panic Button |Day Counter | Rebooting Resources|Forum Rules | Glossary

    If you wish to keep a journal of your progress you can do so in the appropriate section found here

    You can also take part in one of the many challenges available. It can be a tremendous help. Challenges

    Also, there are groups you can also join if you wish to do so. You can browse through them here. Groups

    There are plenty of wonderful, friendly and knowledgeable people here to help you along on your journey to a life free of PMO. I wish you nothing but the best!
     
  3. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Thanks for the links!
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  4. Coffee Candy

    Coffee Candy Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

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    Hey welcome to the forum its good to meet you and have fighting the good fight alongside us

    Some advice:
    Be sure and give a look through all the threads, you might find something to be of great help to you.

    I strongly advise you to be active on your profile; start by choosing an avatar and then make daily posts to show you're active and needing support/encouragement. They've got a neat little feature that shows freshly posted statuses for all users to see. People will find your profile and give you
    encouragement/support.
    ★People love to communicate in the profiles section and also the journal section. These are 2 of the most important sections. Also, we could always use your help in supporting members around the forum and in return you most likely will receive some as well!

    You should also highly consider creating a public journal (in the appropriate section[<-- link] for you ) and write about your days in more depth for us members to follow along on your journey!

    Last but not least: Good luck on your journey here, make sure to really give it a try with all your heart!

    P.S. I love your username and would love the explanation for it if possible lol have a good day : )
     
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2019
    river tree star likes this.
  5. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Hey Coffee Candy,

    Thanks for your reply and your pointers! I take to heart what you say about being active on the site. I'm not used to being online much. My social life exists mostly in the physical world, and I'm not used to spending time online to communicate. But I feel I really need to connect with people who are dealing with the same challenges that I do, so this platform could be a great help. To start, I picked an avatar as you recommended :) I'm still reading the getting started guide and will look at the profile and journal pages next. At this point I find it hard to believe I could succeed at a 90 day reboot, but since others have done it, why couldn't I, right...?

    P.S. My user name was just what came to mind spontaneously when I had to fill out the form to sign up. I often feel how we humans forget the mysterious cosmos that has given birth to us, and in which we exist. So this image popped into my mind of a river at night with a tall oak tree on its shore and a bright star above its crown.
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.
  6. Coffee Candy

    Coffee Candy Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

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    You're welcome, I hope everything works out for you on here.
    You've come to the right place but make sure to make some efforts (the first move in talking to others)sometimes ..: )
    Good job on the avatar!
    Nice initiatives you're taking.
    I believe you can if you work hard enough..but you know what? thats just a number.. many people progress here without reaching ninety.. : ) Don't worry too much..just work on being a better you. No pressures.
     
    river tree star likes this.
  7. Coffee Candy

    Coffee Candy Moderator Assistant Staff Member Moderator Assistant

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    Oh and I lovedd the meaning to your username!
     
  8. rafael33

    rafael33 Fapstronaut

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    ***smile***
    I try to avoid the posts of so-called Christian people. Often I read about the „sin“ of sex. The only sin I know is wasting time.

    Welcome to the Nofap community.
    The NO PMO journey is not easy but worth the effort.
    The community will support you.
    I also prefer short-term streaks like 14-days. When I made it, I prolonged. For those who are really porn-addicted a 90-days-streak may be perfect. It’s your choice which commitment you want to make - not to the community but to yourself.
    Good luck!
     
    river tree star likes this.
  9. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Thanks! I appreciate what you say. The shorter challenges sound like a good idea for me. 90 days is a great goal but not one I can reach right now. I'm not yet able to envision that. Even 7 days would be a victory. I've tried before to stop and always find that very soon the urges start coming and the memories bombarding my thoughts, and when this continues for a while I tend to just give in. Maybe I can postpone for a couple of days but then something in me goes "f*** it". So it'll take me time to learn to let these impulses pass and not give them my attention. So a 7 day challenge is probably the best place to start for me. I'll sign up for the 7 day challenge and keep going until I can finish it. May take me some time, but it is good to see there are other people taking this on.
     
    rafael33 likes this.
  10. Trying358

    Trying358 Fapstronaut

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    Heh, I know the feeling. I'd go two, may be three days and then give in and cum several times to make up for lost time!

    Anyway, I'm new here as you are and have gone 10 days, making short commitments as you did. First few days were easy, then there were a couple of days when I had moments when I was going through hell and didn't see how I could continue. But beginning yesterday with day 9 it started to get manageable, I was horny all day but it didn't feel bad like I had to do it, and same today. And the funny thing is when I think about reaching down there, even though I'm horny I mostly don't feel like it. So now I'm committed to two weeks and 30 days or even longer seem possible, so I'm hoping to do the full 30 days. It's not like I want to be a monk or anything, but I'm beginning to think there really is something in porn addiction and that if I don't look at porn, I'll direct my energy back to real life women (and yeah, I'll be more dependent on them, but isn't that why we have a sex drive?) and fap only occasionally when my natural sex drive says to. After all, we didn't evolve with porn and I think this is what nature has in mind.

    Oh, and I feel great! Which is why I keep going. Not only was porn a waste of time (an hour a day looking at it and masturbating), but I'd spend many more hours thinking and talking about sex, and except on the rare days I didn't do it I'd feel drained. Now I'm full of energy all the time. Something to look forward to!
     
    river tree star likes this.
  11. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Thanks for sharing your story! Wow, ten days, for me that sounds like an eternity. I'm not sure, to be honest, if I've ever spent ten days in a row without masturbation since I was a teenager (which is a long time ago). So I'm a little nervous about it, but also excited that it may be possible. Thanks for the encouragement! And I hope you can finish your 30 days!
     
    Trying358 likes this.
  12. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Just re-read conversation with @Trying358 of August 13, which is just 2 weeks ago. At the time 10 days no PM seemed almost impossible to me. But I'm looking at my "10 Days Without Porn and Masturbation" tracker that appears beneath my last post on this thread and thinking: Yea, cool!!!
     
    Trying358 likes this.
  13. Trying358

    Trying358 Fapstronaut

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    Way to go!

    I can't believe I'm at 23 days myself. My 30-day goal now seems entirely doable. People said that weeks 2-4 are the hardest but for me, things got a lot easier. I'm not flatlining, either -- at least, I still get hard. I'm just not driven and sex-obsessed the way I was, and yesterday I found myself wondering "Why did I want this?" about all the weird stuff I'd gotten into.
     
  14. river tree star

    river tree star Fapstronaut

    Wow awesome @Trying358 ! You are ahead of me, and an inspiration. The fact that we started around the same time and you've kept going for over 3 weeks already gives me confidence. At the moment it feels like I could keep going for another while, but I can also feel some temptation is building again. You're at 23 days, and I am rooting for you to make it to 30 days like you set out to do, and then beyond. Maybe if you can do it, so can I...
     
    Trying358 likes this.
  15. Trying358

    Trying358 Fapstronaut

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    If I can do it, anyone can. :) It really does make a change in your life. There were definitely moments when I thought I was going to fail, but that's all calmed down now, but I made it, and I'm sure you can too!
     
    river tree star likes this.

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