New to the fapstronauts!

You can refer to me as Pinkman cause I am not yet THE Heisenberg!

I am 21 years old and I have been struggling with pornograpghy addiction for about 2-3 years now. It all started with a moment of temptation between my current girlfriend and I. She allowed me to see her partially nude and ever since then I have been fantasizing about being with her. I am a Christian youth leader and for this reason it makes it even tougher to be able to tell anyone about this. I am supposed to live up to a higher standard to give an example, but at times it feels as if I have lost my faith and I am not allowing God to work through me. There is a lot I can say about how i feel but I honestly just think that I have a correct mindset when it comes to overcoming this addiction. I just keep failing though. The last time I was free from this was for about 1 month last march. I had problems with being voyeuristic towards my girlfriend and ever since she caught me I have had to rebuild this relationship from scratch. Ever since then she has truly allowed herself to be committed to God and living by His word but I am still left here in the dark without her knowing about my struggle. We are doing pretty well now but the thing is she still believes that I am free from this addiction. If anyone can take some time to listen to my story, I would be really indebted to them. God is my #1 and I do plan on marrying my girl, but i do not want to bring this deadly toxin into my relationship any further.

God bless!