Newb (original title)

Hi everyone!

After lurking and reading a bit I decided I'm going to start the "normal mode" of the NoFap program (or however you want to call it, PM-mode). Just thought I'd share a bit of my (recognizeable) story here a bit already.

Started using porn already at 12 years old, basically when I first got internet for the first time, I have been using it pretty much half of my life. At that age it probably was not healthy to begin with (debatable) but I still consider my usage to be of acceptable amount, that is, until a couple of years ago. It was a slippery slope thing but I guess I'd say the real trouble started about four years ago, when normal porn didn't cut it anymore and i started watching transsexual porn.

It started getting worse and worse, the same old story you've undoubtedly heard a million times, where I kept watching extremer versions and started looking at escorts and transsexual dating sites (purely for sex reasons), and here's the kicker: I have a girlfriend. After every session of online chatting or masturbation I felt so ashamed of my behaviour, but after a while I forgot about it again and the story repeats itself. I kept telling myself that I will be satisfied "if I just have this one more experience" which never seemed to work.

I am very grateful that I started googling a bit and came across this community before things got too bad. I am the first to admit I have done some bad things, especially with regard to my girlfriend that I care very deeply for, but I think I'm atleast still at a point where I can say I have a problem that I need to fix before things got too much out of control. I want to get rid of my disgusting behaviour and make myself a better person. For myself but also for my environment.

Thank you for reading and I wish you all the best of luck! Day one, go!